Intertextuality

Intertextuality is the shaping of texts' meanings by other texts. It can refer to an author’s borrowing and transformation of a prior text or to a reader’s referencing of one text in reading another. In the case of tGA it means that the RPers are quoting or generally referring to various novels, films, pop culture phenomena and such in their texts. Examples of such uses are listed below.

300

"So, this is a race against time," Belial muttered and turned to the representatives and citizens. "I'm sure all of you have heard these grave news! Although Maar Sul is still holding on, the enemy is gathering its strength and will strike again if given enough time to recover. My countrymen might not hold off the second attack wave once it comes, so we should go to Maar Sul before that happens. If Maar Sul falls, Remon will certainly be next!"

"I agree with Count de Ardyn! We must go and aid our old allies before the enemy turns its attention to our fair country!" Crowley roared. "If all the other representatives are cowards, then at least I will answer the call! I will not be remembered as a coward!"

"This is madness!" Ferron cried out. "Even if all of us somehow decided to help Maar Sul, it'd nevertheless take quite some time to organize..."

The baron grinned. "Madness? You're wrong. This... is... REMON! This is what the Grand Alliance is all about! Are you with me?"

Ace Combat 6: Fires of Liberation

As Skye's song resonated and Faeli's dance gave it rhythm, Skye could've sworn she had heard a warm voice echo in the wind, a voice she didn't know the source of but whose comforting words nearly made her cry for reasons she didn't understand. It was as if the very world was singing with her and the dragons even though she knew it to be impossible, and she wondered if the Matriarch mentioning an 'Archmuse' was actually based on something real rather than just being a poetic phrase about dreams that had been woven eons ago...

The dawn, a brand new day. The sun beating back the endless night. So let time march onward. You're safe and all is right because this new world will soon be here...

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.

Example 1

Refan blinked. "Skye, wait. You've got it wrong. I had nothing to do with any of this."

Skye's eyes grew wide as she looked into Refan's eyes. "I can't believe it! All this time, after everything we've been through...you lie to me, your wife? Why? How could you?"

Refan saw the look in his warrior's eyes and realized his control had slipped. Why had he gotten so agitated about Gabriel? If he had pushed thoughts of his son away and focused on Skye alone, she would've already been his. He still felt angry that Gabriel had been lured to Threshold by Kaisa, no doubt, and he'd make the girl pay for endangering his son. But first, he'd have to win Skye over and make her his again. The burning need of desire was too strong to ignore anymore...

"Look, let's make this clear. I didn't want to disturb you needlessly...so I may have said one thing but meant another. But the truth is that I was on a mission. It didn't start out as personal...but I made it so in order to be reunited with you, Skye," Refan explained, releasing his grip. "I was a thief who had been driven into a corner, surrounded by enemies who required my assistance, the only reason they kept me alive. I had a job."

"Your eyes tell me everything. You've killed several people by now, haven't you? I know that you've attempted to kill or hurt even more such as Kaisa, while serving those 'enemies'! You even wore that...that Northern Horde's colors the last time we met!" Skye pointed out. "Perhaps you've pillaged and raped with them, too! What are you going to do? Rape me now...or kill me if I refuse? I still remember the look you gave me and Ax...the woman you wanted to hold in your arms so passionately! My mind was hazy for a moment, but that must've been one of the tricks your new comrades taught you, right? But I can see past the illusion now! This...this is just like that last time in the inn when you fled, isn't it? You...you're still the same like before!"

"Skye, don't say things like that. I'd never hurt you," the thief countered.

The warrior narrowed her eyes. "And yet you allow your new...friends to rampage through the city, attacking people, including your former Alliance comrades, by the dozen? The man I once knew would never let that happen! He'd fight--"

"You think I had a part in that? That I'd let them do anything to you?" Refan gasped. "You know how I feel about you, Skye!"

Skye waited for a moment before she spoke. "So, even though you've been lying to everyone about everything, wanted another woman for yourself when your current one didn't satisfy you enough, and killed and harmed those who stood in your way, you're saying that your feelings for me..."

"...are still real, Skye," Refan said soothingly, staring at the woman. His wife. "They always have been. Ax, you and I will live happily ever after...just like we were always meant to be."

Skye's look turned to one of shock before she grimaced. "I...I'm going to throw up."

Refan frowned. "You...you think this has been easy for me? Do you have any idea how hard it was?" he hissed. "The sacrifices, the decisions I had to make...but I made them! Because that's what I do. I'm a survivor!"

"No. You've become a monster...just like your brother. I tried to deny it and cling to hope...but I see now it's futile. We were too late. The darkness within has already consumed you," Skye sighed. "We've both changed, and I've realized something. Remember how when we talked about your heritage all those years ago, you said I wouldn't like the real you, the demon underneath? You know what? You were right."

"Skye, please." The thief looked at his wife and suddenly felt heavy, like great weight had been put on his shoulders. "Someday...someday you'll understand."

"No, I won't. That time's long gone. I...I was a fool to believe things could return to the way they were...after you sold your humanity, your friends, and most importantly your own family, for power," Skye said gravely. The look in her eyes had changed. It was no longer one of despair or shock...now her eyes were full of grim determination, the likes of which Refan hadn't seen in a long time. "I will never, ever give you what you want, Reffie. You're no longer the man I once fell in love with. That man is dead now, consumed by the monster."

Example 2

"You can't play mute forever, Gabriel," the dark-haired man said, scratching his stubble, as he finally made eye contact with the teen and broke the tense silence. "It's been, what? A week since we last talked? Whatever. This is not how to treat your father, not when things are like...this."

Gabriel narrowed his eyes, crossing his arms. "You're nothing like a father anymore, Refan. You're a rogue. No, you're a monster, a murderer! You leave a trail of death wherever you go! Why Kaisa's dad, those Alentians or whoever the hell they were let you run away like that is beyond me, considering what you've done to this city, to all of us!"

Refan d'Zarnagon sighed, his eyes staring into his son's eyes. "You know calling me by my given name alone hurts me? I'm the one who sired you, after all, so you should have the courtesy to address me as such; say or think whatever you want, but blood never lies. I will always be your father, whether you like it or not."

He paused for a while before continuing, choosing each word carefully. "And the other things you said, they...well, they're all true, but you need to understand something. My little boy, you, was taken from me, and my world fell apart. I still vividly remember our final day together in that Remonian cottage, just the three of us, before the Cardian inquisitors showed up and burned it all down, separating us from each other while seemingly killing your mother, my wife, in the process. That was the worst day of my life. When Ferron, their wretched leader, told me later what he had done to your mind with his magic to ensure I'd dance to his tune, I felt anger unlike anything I'd felt before, even surpassing what I felt during the night I lost my friends in Ravensworth, or when I lost my...mother, your grandmother, to brigands who burned our home down, who made me an orphan."

Gabriel remained silent, so Refan continued all the while observing his body language. "Ferron and his bloodhounds hurt you in ways I can't even imagine. You, my flesh and blood, my only son! And I hope you'll never remember whatever horrors those Cardians did to you as they proved to me without a doubt that monsters exist in Light just as they exist in Darkness. Clerics of Cardia and Mardük took what I cared for away from me, forced me into becoming who I am today!" His voice grew louder and louder as rage was close to overcoming him. "The gods...they have played our family for pawns for far too long! I only wish Cardia and Mardük would've died sooner and in even greater pain for what they did to us...what their lingering minions still do to us to this very day in their attempt to turn us against each other. They've all tried to take away the happiness we deserve as a family!"

Refan stepped towards his son, only to see the boy back away with his fists clenched. The half-demon stopped in his tracks and sighed again. "I...I'm sorry for that outbrust, Gabriel. I wasn't always like...this, you know. When you were first born, your mother and I were so happy despite the harsh conditions we lived in away from everything and everyone else. Even before that, we had adventures together, facing many challenges as a couple. Skye made me remember what it felt like to feel joy again after so many years of facing darkness. Her kiss brought a heart I thought was long gone back to life with strength that surprised me. Back then, in the days of the war against Yamato, I had friends who supported me and who I supported in return."

"So, what happened?" Gabriel countered coldly. "Where are those precious friends of yours now, huh? And where is mom, for that matter? Oh, that's right, I forgot; the last time I saw her, you were trying to hurt her just like you tried to hurt your friends who then turned their backs on you...just like she did when she saw what you had become. When I saw what you tried to do to mom, well, I wasn't going to let the same thing happen to her that happened to that...that inquisitor in the snow with bite marks all over him, when you showed me for the first time what kind of creature you really were inside. I'm never going to let you hurt mom, not as long as I live and breathe. Mom was the one who came after me, not you! She saved me from those clerics, she brought me with her here, facing all kinds of dangers, just to find you! And where were you? Killing people, having fun with your new demon friends, trying to shack up with that woman, Ax, like mom was air to you! You're despicable!"

Refan bit his lip and moved his hand through his dark hair, averting his eyes at last from his son's intense stare which hurt him more than any stab in the leg or cutting of a hamstring ever would. He felt cold. So cold. "This...this is the thing I want to say, so just hear me out for a while longer, okay? I...I'm sorry that I couldn't be there for you when you needed me the most, that I couldn't protect you, that I didn't become someone who'd earn your respect despite my best efforts. I know I'm flawed and a terrible disappointment, just like my father, your grandfather, was to me when he didn't save my brother and mother when he could've done so, when he used me to further his dark agenda. But...I want you to know that I'm here now, and everything that's about to happen is supposed to happen. I'm going to take care of you from now on, I swear that on my mother's grave."

"Then get me out of here!" Gabriel spat.

This time it was the half-demon's turn to frown. "Maybe I haven't been clear, son, or maybe you're too angry to understand what is going on. You're exactly where you're supposed to be now. This is your destiny, Gabriel."

Gabriel's nostrils flared, and he straightened up. His stare was even more intense now if that was possible. "You can't say you're sorry, or that losing me ruined your life, and then kidnap me and see that my destiny is to be locked up with you and...and Team Distreyd! It's crazy and it's creepy...and I'm out of here!" He stormed to the door and opened it, only to come face to face with two muscular and tall men standing guard who blocked the way. He glared at his father. "Tell these freakshows to get out of the way! Now!"

Refan hurried to the door, smiling sheepishly at the two guards who stared coldly at the pair. "Don't mind this. Just a little misunderstanding, that's all. As you were," he said quickly to the guards and closed the door before they could respond. He saw Gabriel back down with fists raised that indicated that the boy was ready to fight. Refan raised his hands in the air to indicate he had no ill intentions as he, too, backed away from the door. "Trust me, Gabriel. They don't matter. After Alent has fallen, none of them will matter."

"Of course they matter!" Gabriel shouted. "You work for Distreyd Thanadar, the damn high cleric of Chaos or whatever asshole god he serves! Not only that, you also have demon allies too, for crying out loud! They're the bad guys. That makes you a bad guy!"

"No, I don't work for Distreyd!" Refan growled, his eyes flashing red. "I needed him and the Northern Horde to help me find you, my son, to put our family back together!" He breathed in and out before he continued in a calmer tone, forcing a strained smile on his face. "It's not your fault, Gabriel. Don't worry. Daddy's gonna make it all right just like he did to you back home. I said it once, and I'll say it again: no matter what happens to us from now on, I'll never abandon you again. Never. You mean the world to me...and you're the only one I have left now, the only one that matters."

Aladdin

Haruko rested her head against the Oracle's shoulder as they gazed at the night sky in the observatory in the king's garden. "I never thought it'd end this way," she muttered dreamily as she felt his fingers move gently through her dark hair. She touched the necklace he had given her as a gift; a beautiful golden one with a shining emerald in its centre.

The Oracle kissed the girl on the forehead, and she pressed herself closer to his warm body under the blanket they were sharing. "You've changed everything since you showed up here, Enchantress," he whispered to her. "You showed me the world in a new light and made me realize what matters the most, and for that I'm eternally grateful to you."

Haruko smiled. "A whole new world, a new fantastic point of view. No one to tell us no or where to go...or say we're only dreaming," she recited the lyrics of a famous Barjassilian song absent-mindedly. She could stay like this forever.

Ali

Ismail parried a strike from Dreadlord Leraje. He felt the thrill of battle inside his bulging veins, and his muscles trembled with excitement as he leaped to the left, narrowly avoiding a vicious jab that had been aimed at his face.

The captain of the Black Guard snorted. "Is that all you've got?" he muttered, readying his blade. He could not help it; he had not felt like this in years. Fighting against the Dreadlord reminded him of the time when Belial had sparred with him. He had not lost a single battle, not even against Belial, and he intended to keep it that way.

Leraje attacked again. Ismail was experienced, however, and managed to block most of the attacks. When he couldn't, he used it to land a few blows on the Dreadlord. This man that stood before him didn't look extraordinary except for elaborate tattoos. And yet the Dreadlord's eyes also seemed to remind him of something... no, someone else, but who?

He quickly swept such thoughts aside. Now he just had to buy some time for his companions before he finally ended this game and landed the finishing blow. If all went well, the heroes would reach the prisoners via the Sirithai tunnels and escape with most of them before the demons even realized what had happened. His friends relied on his ability of stalling the battle, and he wasn't going to let them down.

"Boma ye, Ismail! Boma ye!" the voices of the Black Guard chanted from the wall. It was a Sarquil battle chant, meaning "kill him."

Yes... so many people relied on him, he held the fate of his homeland on the tip of his curved blade.

Babylon 5

"From the Time of Four it began, in the Time of One it will end. So it is with you: four you must conquer before you can reach the one. Four simple questions from the dawn of dawns you must answer to bare your soul at the hour of dusk, but sometimes the simplest ones are the hardest to answer for they reach into the very core of your being, transcending past, present and future. Answer, but choose your answers carefully. Lack the courage, strength, wisdom and humility, and your answers shall be your last."

The voice grew stronger as it spoke and then, without warning, it asked four questions one after the other, leaving them echoing in the air around Oscar:

"These the ancients answered at the dawn of dawns, to awaken at last, to become whole. So tell me: Who are you? What do you want? Why are you here? Where are you going?"

Billie Eilish

Marie noticed that the one who had been jeering at her by using her hummable melody as a mocking call sign of sorts was one of the teenage Sinlarine girls passing by. Their raven hair, delicate milky skin and slightly slanted eyes spoke of their exotic origins.

"Look, Eilish! What a Strange Addiction that one has, humming to herself without a partner while reading something like that!" one of the girl's friends said while nodding in Marie's direction.

Eilish, the girl leading the group with somewhat glazed eyes and dark hair dyed a shade of greyish blue, smirked. "What's more baffling is that hairstyle. Buns? Didn't that go out of fashion, like, in the previous century or so? I'd rather Bury a Friend than get caught seen out in public with such a crippling style!"

"Maybe we should invite her along to give her real fashion tips When the Party's Over?" the other girl suggested.

"Ah, yes, the party with the fancy costumes and all celebrating dear Grandma Faolain's passing. You Should See Me in a Crown as I intend to win the dance-off today!" Eilish chuckled.

Bioshock

Adram cleared his throat. "I'm Adram Alek, and I'm here to ask you a question: is a man not entitled to the sweat of his own brow? No, says the man in Maar Sul. It belongs to the poor! No, says the man in the church. It belongs to the memory of Cardia! No, says the man in Remonton. It belongs to everyone! I rejected those answers. Instead I chose something different. I chose the impossible, I chose... Ravensworth!"

Blackadder

Princess Maple took the news of her father's disappearance at the Battle of Victoire stoically.

"There is no time for tears," she said, "If Father is truly dead, then I shall be Queen. I have to show my people that I am ready for that, even if I am confident in his safety."

"Why are you so sure he's OK?" inquired a Maar Sulais maid.

"He's terribly smart," Maple replied. Then, a moment later, amended. "For a Scun."

Outside, a throng of agitated Scuns waited for a speech.

"You're on, Highness," said an aide.

"One moment. Maid, fetch me two pencils and my underpants."

Puzzled, the aides looked on as the vertically-challenged Princess of Scundia stretched a pair of underpants over her head and inserted two pencils into her nose and marched out to meet the waiting crowd.

"Wibble," she announced.

Then she vomited.

Brave

"A naoidhean bhig, cluinn mo ghuth. Mise ri d' thaobh..."

Xerathas d'Zarnagon found his body tense, yet he hadn't been hit by any spell. Instead he heard a voice humming softly in a language which sounded foreign...no, not...foreign. Familiar.

The voice repeated the phrase of this song, the melody of which made his body react to it. But it couldn't be magic, could it? And at that moment, as the voice was singing, he understood the words...as if a mist had cleared, letting sunshine into the darkness for the briefest of moments...

"Little baby, hear my voice. I'm beside you," he muttered the translated words in Common, and suddenly his head began hurting. A sensation he vaguely recalled when he'd been with his father in the Dark Tower all those years ago, surrounded by...cloaked...people...

"So you remember...or at least will remember soon enough," the voice sighed. "I'm glad that we can finally meet. Your father has grown so much...and so have you."

Xerathas turned to the source of the voice and saw a black-haired, tattooed woman standing beside the slumbering Godslayer. "What do you think you're doing here, in the inner sanctum?" he asked her. He was already preparing the finishing touches on his spell.

"You didn't ask the most obvious question--who I am--and instead chose the second most obvious one. Your father has taught you well indeed, but he hasn't been the only one who has taught you things," the woman said before her eyes turned to the Godslayer while her hand moved on its scaly skin. "Are you happy now that we're all together again? You should be...because soon things will come full circle, and the moment of despair will overshadow all this joy...and you'll experience what I once had to experience. That is the price of Duality, the calling of a Sinlarine."

"Sinlarine...? You're one of them, those...Ghost Whisperers from Libaterra?" Xerathas muttered. His spell was almost ready to be cast.

"Yes. I'm Kendra of Clan Finian, and a ghost whisperer as you'd call us. I used Voidwalk, an ability of ours which allows us to circumvent most magical blockades including the one surrounding this chamber. It's an ability which few people are aware of, and which we'll now use to our advantage," the woman said quietly. "He has changed so much, hasn't he? The ambitious Zarnagon, once the Witch-king of Myridia and right-hand man of Distreyd Thanadar XII, now the slayer of gods. How young he was when we met all those years ago in Ciano when he sought knowledge of the Dragon Diamond...knowledge which set him on the path of becoming who he is today...the father of our son, the Victorious One. One battle has already ended by now, but another is yet to begin, and I need you for it."

"W-what are you talking about?" Xerathas grunted. The headache returned, and his concentration dropped just as he had been ready to cast the spell to subdue this woman...and yet, something in her eyes and voice seemed strangely...no, it couldn't be...

"Sinlarine may have many names over the years, but it doesn't change who they are deep inside. Our beloved may have changed your true name to one he found more fitting, but he can never change your heritage," Kendra explained, her eyes narrowing when she saw the strained yet serene look on the High Prophet's face. "Don't keep it in anymore; let it flow through you. Hear the calling of your blood. Just as you're your father's son, half of who you are also belongs to me, your mother, and to your clan...Kernaghan Finian."

"Kernaghan?" Xerathas's voice seemed to fade, and he felt sweaty. "Mother? No, my mother's...gone. I don't re..."

"Remember, you say? A Sinlarine never forgets...for the spirits of our ancestors are within us, guiding our every step, keeping memories stored in us...just as they've now guided the lost son to the arms of his mother," Kendra smiled sadly. "The things your father's done to you...ripped your soul apart...just to use you as his tool, his pawn...just like the others...just like the one before him...who cost us the life of the one who started all this, the founder of our clan...Elder Arlen."

She leaned on the Godslayer, her breathing becoming one with it as her eyes looked at the beast. "You failed to take certain things into consideration in your convoluted plan, love. I gave birth to our son, knowing this day would come and that the pain of separation would come to an end. And I knew that no matter how much you'd break our flesh and blood, our son would recover eventually. Just as our skin renews itself, so do fractured souls...over time. You just need the proper trigger, and the Sinlarine blood in his veins, the blood of Clan Finian, shall do the rest."

"Stop talking nonsense!" Xerathas grunted, suddenly realizing that he was grimacing...it had been so long since he'd reacted to anything with other than mind surprise or coldness. Why was all this warmth suddenly flowing through his body?

And just then, Kendra Finian began singing again, continuing where the song from earlier had left off in a soft, calm voice: "Fas as faic do thir, dileas fhein. A ghrian a's a ghealaich, stuir sinn gu uair ar cliu 's ar gloire."

~

Warmth flowing through his body. A smiling face. Familiar, kind yet somewhat sad eyes looming over him, her dark hair within his small hand's reach.

He was crying. He had hurt his finger when trying to pluck a rose for her...his mother. He knew this day had been special, that something irreversible would happen. Cloaked men had come by and talked to the family, telling them the 'time had come' to meet the father who lived far away.

"Shh...little Kernaghan. It's alright. I'm here, the clan's here. We'll always be here with you, my son, no matter how far away we are," she whispered. "A Sinlarine is never alone for fire will always walk with him...the fiery determination of our ancestors. We're all part of a bigger tapestry woven over time. You'll understand one day. Stay strong until then."

His mother took his hand in hers, caressing it gently, and began singing softly a song he would hear a lifetime later. The same lyrics repeated themselves, and he now knew their meaning as his quiet voice joined with hers, their voices becoming one, the voice of their family, their clan, as they sang in the ancient tongue of the Sinlarine:

"Grow and see your land, your own faithful land. Sun and moon, guide us to the hour of our glory and honour."

~

Xerathas realized his mouth was moving, repeating the words from that dream--no, memory--in a whisper. He touched his cheek, realizing it was wet. Was he...crying? But he couldn't feel anything...not after the ritual in the Dark Tower so long ago which had made him who he was as his father had turned him into his successor all those years ago. And yet these memories that had surfaced a moment ago had predated the memories from the tower which had been his earliest memories until now.

"Mo...ther..." Xerathas d'Zarnagon--Kernaghan Finian--muttered, his voice wavering for the first time in what felt like a lifetime ago.

Blue Öyster Cult

An elderly Sinlarine man was kneeling in front of an altar. That part was fairly normal. A white-haired girl was lying on the altar. That part was...less normal, but Ax supposed she might be ill, and the elderly man was praying for her recovery. Hovering above the altar was a hooded, skeletal figure carrying a scythe.

"--that's definitely not normal!"

Both the Sinlarine man and the skeletal figure turned to look at her, their expressions inscrutable.

Ax took a step back. "Uhh...sorry. Didn't mean to interrupt your routine virgin sacrifice to the Reaper or whatever's going on here. None of my business, obviously! And like that old song says: Seasons don't fear the Reaper, nor do the wind, the sun or the goats? Or whatever. So...yeah. I'll just be...going..."

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

It was then Varalia heard the woman in white aboard the Seastrider begin her song. It was a sad and beautiful tune like the songs she had heard that graceful bard sing before: when she had first entered the Cove aboard Makoto's ship, and later at the docks of the Cove when she'd been fighting Gilgamesh who had broken her and tossed her into the sea to drown. And just like those songs, this song, too, stirred something in her heart:

"I touch the fire and it freezes me

I look into it and it's black

Why can't I feel,

My skin should crack and peel

I want the fire back"

The past two weeks aboard the Moldy Crow had been rather interesting, to say the least. Even if Uminoko had more or less blackmailed her into serving her needs before allowing her to accompany the crew on the voyage, Varalia didn't deny that, despite their rather shady deal, what had followed hadn't been all that unpleasant.

"Now through the smoke he calls to me

To make my way across the flame

To save the day

Or maybe melt away

I guess it's all the same"

Varalia couldn't help but wonder if the bard was singing and basing this on something that happened to her in the past, or if her act was simply so convincing that she made you believe the pain behind the lyrics. It was then the elf suddenly coughed. First once, then twice. She quickly took out a handkerchief, covered her mouth with it and coughed a few more times until she managed to steady her breath again. As she took out the handkerchief, she glanced at it, seeing blood. It was a grim reminder of what future had in store for her now that the symptoms had become visible.

"So I will walk through the fire

'Cause where else can I turn?

I will walk through the fire

And let it--"

Silk's voice wavered a bit, and she coughed, which briefly interrupted her song. She pulled her cloak tighter around her to keep herself warm, and continued her song from the next verse. However, Varalia's thoughts had only briefly been interrupted before she continued pondering where her Blood Fever infection would lead her.

Belief had gotten her all this way, and it would lead her to the end...of everything. She found the rather somber lyrics of the bard's song oddly fitting, as if they were coinciding with or reinforcing what she was currently thinking of.

"So one by one they turn from me,

I guess my friends can't face the cold

But why I froze,

Not one among them knows

And never can be told"

As she finished this quiet prayer to the God of War, she suddenly felt the ship she was on rock gently even though this spot had been dead calm earlier. She saw people hurrying to and fro and some people pointing in the water, the same actions being repeated aboard the Seastrider and the Morning Star, just as Silk's song was about to reach its heartwrenching climax:

"These endless days are finally ending in a blaze

And we are caught in the fire

The point of no return

So we will walk through the fire

And let it..."

At that moment, the sea serpent rose from the water head-first in all its scaly glory with a mighty splash, its jaws reaching for the now glowing Dusk. During the chaos which had been unleashed, Silk concluded her song, finally finishing the last word of the previously interrupted chorus:

"...burn!"

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid

The swordsman felt human hands on his arm and turned to face Fonzie and his monkey. To the detective's surprise, he wore a blindfold.

"Listen, whoever you are, I can't hear or smell you at the moment, but if you're up to help just push me into or away from the demon when appropriate. Also, be on the lookout for its ally, who may be in human form."

Fonzie looked at Ted nervously. In response to this the little monkey pulled out his own service dagger and raised it in solidarity.

"Right, it's decided then. Nice knowing you, Ted."

And with that, they both screamed and shoved the blind lunatic at the cyclops. To their surprise he reached out his hand, caressed the scary bastard's neck, and through this seemed to realize the dimensions of it enough to leap onto its shoulders and plunge the katana into its radiation spewing eye. A roar shook the whole of downtown Trinity Gask, and people ran screaming for their lives.

"I felt that, Bessy. It was good for me, too!" said the blind swordsman. Fonzie and Ted traded a puzzled expression before moving in with their own weapons.

Castlevania: Symphony of the Night

"But enough talk! Bottoms up!" Qarinah declared.

Elsewhere, a man in blue with a whip at his side raised an eyebrow before saying, "That's not how that goes."

"Come on, Richter!" a blond girl quite a bit younger than him persisted, insistent on leading him somewhere.

The moment was forgotten, and they continued.

Conan the Barbarian

Varalia's eyes grew wide. No matter how much she struggled, the Pirate King's grip on her arm was firm, and he was slowly bending her arm so she'd drop the dagger...and then he'd have his way with her. She knew that look in his eyes all too well as the pleasant facade was dropped. It was the same look she had seen in the eyes of Zarnagon and Hiroki Hyuga all those years ago, and even in the eyes of Gilgamesh: men who got what they wanted no matter what.

Was this how it was going to end? With her being subdued yet again, to be left in the mercy of another man who would tarnish her? She couldn't bear it, not anymore, not when she'd been saved from certain death. It couldn't have all been in vain! And at this moment of desperation, words from the past came to her...words she had heard a long time ago from the mouth of the man who had branded her with the mark of the God of War and helped her seize her destiny. Words which had affected her that she remembered them even now, decades later...

"Nergal...if you're listening to me, hear me," Varalia grunted as she struggled against the Pirate King. "I know I've prayed rarely because I have no tongue for it; I've been beaten too many times to open my mouth without a good reason. No one, not even you, will remember if we were good or bad when we were first made. Why we fought, or why we died, or when we first discovered the answer to the riddle of steel. All that matters is that your clergy rose to fight in your name to change this world, and that we stood against the might of the many no matter how many times we were struck down..."

Kuro Tori laughed. "<<Don't bother with such foolishness, woman. No one can save you now from the wrath of Tiamat! Make it easy on yourself and give up before I break your arm!>>"

"The fight must continue; that's what's important! Valor and resilience pleases you, Nergal, my lord...and have I not shown both by surviving this long? If so, grant me but one request. Grant me revenge in your name! And if you do not listen, then to Hell with you!" Varalia screamed as her body tensed. She could feel pain in the mark of War, as if it was on fire. When she focused on Kuro Tori and looked into his eyes, she saw the same fire in her eyes in that reflection.

The Dark Knight

"Come on, just a kiss, wench!" His captive simply spat at his face, making him blink in surprise but did nothing to loosen his steel grip. An amused chuckle escaped from the soldier, a dark grin making it's way across his face."So, looks like you have some fight left in you. I like that!"

"Then you're going to love me."

The soldier had enough time to register that the sultry whisper had not come from his captive before Uminoko drove her blade through the back of his throat.

Doctor Who

"So how will we know that we've reached this... time machine?" Refan huffed. "I'd hate to be buried alive so I sincerely hope you're not pulling our leg, professor."

"Don't worry. The TARDIS is quite easy to spot. It looks like a phone booth," the Lindworm replied.

The thief blinked. "A what?"

"A phone booth. It's short for a phonetics booth which is used in grammar schools. People enunciate in the booth; it was originally built for Scuns who had trouble pronouncing words properly."

Refan rolled his eyes. "I know what that means; my brother used to joke that if I didn't learn to pronounce 's' and 'r' properly before I went to school, I'd end up in a phone booth with Scuns. But what does TARDIS stand for? It sounds like 'retard.'"

"You're half correct. The name itself has nothing to do with retards but its designers, the Scuns, could be classified as such as they gave it quite a... unique name. TARDIS is short for Traumatic Ass-Raping Discontinuity Isolator-Stripper. I'm sure you understand why we prefer to abbreviate the full Scunnish name and just call it TARDIS in academic circles."

"That name makes no sense! What the hell does a stripper have to do with discontinuity?" Refan gasped. "Wait! You're just joking, right? There's no logical way that idiots like Scuns could've created something so advanced... unless the future has gone straight to hell."

Dr. Strangelove

"Gentlemen, please don't fight in here. We're not in the war room at the moment," a man twirling his red, long moustache interrupted them in a clearly condescending tone.

DragonBall Z Abridged

Vani's eyes narrowed. "Sister Vahista!" she hissed. "Why are you here? I thought Mother gave you to those humans as punishment for what you did?"

Vahista smirked. "The lesser beings and I disagreed with the terms of the arrangement. They wanted themselves to live and, well, I didn't."

Dungeons & Dragons

"Besides, 'evil' is never very clearly defined enough to detect it. Whoever thought of that was a moron."

A group of wizards that lived in a city on the coast of some nation or other started shouting about the nature of evil at random paladins they came across for the next five minutes.

The Emperor's New Groove

Back at the ball, Qarinah had just drank the entire contents of the mug. She slammed it down on the table, smacked her lips, and said, "Tasty." Half a second later, she slumped face first on the table with a 'thump.' Stylianos rolled his eyes and stood up, hoisting her over his shoulder. She seemed still conscious, although barely.

The dwalf looked at Rain. "You did warn her. Best she goes to sleep now, I think. Would you happen to know where she takes her rest?"

Elsewhere, a freakishly old woman woke up rather violently, immediately sitting up. "That wasn't poison!"

Enchanted

The smirking councillor then gestured to the side where a few people were standing. "We're honoured to have four influential people not from Alent joining us today. I'd like to present King Marcus Sarillius of Remon, King Khasra Mallorein III of Scundia, and last but not least, Sultan Khalid al-Saif and his lovely bride, Sultana Axikasha Keiran from the Sultanate of Karaganda, all members of the Grand Alliance. To honour this momentous occasion of having all these fancy royals among us, this ball shall be known as the King and Queen's Ball!"

Crowe returned his eyes to the room which was full of people from all ages, Alentians and foreigners alike, ranging from mages to merchants, and from soldiers to sweethearts. "Well, folks, the time you've all been waiting for has come. I'd like to ask each lady and gentleman to invite the person they care for--whether a friend or a loved one--to dance the King and Queen's Dance. This will start off our festivities in earnest as we celebrate a long and prosperous alliance between Alent, the Sarquil and of course the Grand Alliance!"

He winked. "So grab that ass or hunk next to you and enjoy yourself--and the food and drinks we've provided for this occasion--to the fullest. The bar's open long past midnight, so be sure to check it out. You're all kings and queens today and, more importantly, tonight! Ok, let's hit it, boys!"

The Black Mages band began playing a surprisingly calm and romantic song which seemed at odds with the councillor's boisterous persona. Crowe seemed to enjoy the moment and being in the spotlight. And yet when he opened his mouth, he sang in a surprisingly touching, heartfelt way in his crooning voice which fit in perfectly with the accompanying melody which the players of the band provided.

Razoul turned his attention elsewhere, however, when he saw the slim, pale and raven-haired figure of Rain approaching him. "Razoul, I...I've been meaning to talk to you since the argument we had at the stables, but you've been so distant since then," she began, trying to find the proper words. "But there's something we must discuss, something I have to say before--"

"Captain, there you are! We have to do something!" Lamashtu addressed Razoul as she gracefully walked between the awkward pair. "Look at our men and women. Do you see how they're all hesitating? This isn't something they're used to, and I can sympathize with them...but we're meant to loosen up if only a little, to stop worrying if only for today, so that we can face the challenges that await us in the future. We need to set an example which others can follow. That's our responsibility as leaders."

Razoul turned from Rain to the lieutenant, only for his eyes grow wide when he took a better look at her. "W-what is this?"

Unlike her earlier soldier's uniform, Lamashtu now looked like another person here at the ball. She was dressed in a gorgeous green gown which complimented her curvy figure and made her look alluringly beautiful while the light of the lanterns reflected from her determined eyes in ways which Razoul couldn't hope to describe with words.

"Oh, captain, I didn't mean to startle you. I just thought that if we're going to the ball, all of us should look our best, myself included. Although a Sarquil lives for battle, it doesn't mean we can't enjoy other things that life offers us and the joy we can receive from each other's company," the lieutenant said, twirling a lock of her dark, curly hair as if she was unsure what to say next. "What's with that look? Do I look...ugly to you? Perhaps I shouldn't have put this gown on, what was I thinking..."

"No, you look...fine," Razoul grunted, suddenly finding it very hard to breathe as he couldn't help but stare at the lieutenant. Lamashtu had looked beautiful before but now she looked almost as radiant as the goddess Artemicia herself in that breathtaking gown. The captain coughed awkwardly before he continued. "Anyway, uh, what exactly did you mean when you said something about setting an example?"

"Well, you see how anxious our men and women are, yes? But they're unaccustomed to these kinds of events and yet they desire each other's company. I can see it in their eyes. We should help them be more at ease by showing them that dancing is nothing to be afraid of," Lamashtu replied. "You're a captain, I'm a lieutenant, and if we go out there and dance as their superiors, the others from our tribes will follow our example, and we can create a more relaxed atmosphere. Isn't that what this ball is for? To help our people relax after all the horrible things they've witnessed?"

"You have a point. It would help set an example. But I...I don't know how to dance," Razoul grunted. "And Rain--"

"That won't be a problem. I can lead you; I've learned a thing or two in my life, and dancing is one of them," Lamashtu interrupted and took Razoul's arm in hers. "Would you honour me with this dance, my captain?"

Razoul sighed, his eyes wavering between the lieutenant and Rain for a moment until he finally settled onto the lieutenant. "Very well then, Lamashtu," he sighed. "I shall sacrifice myself for the sake of the tribes."

The lyrics of the soothingly slow, romantic song which Crowe was singing in a crooning, magically amplified voice filled the hall at that moment:

You're in my arms

And all the world is calm

The music playing on for only two

So close together

And when I'm with you

So close to feeling alive

"I believe that's our cue," Lamashtu purred and pulled Razoul with her as they moved towards the dance floor which was still empty while various people were shifting uncomfortably in the sidelines.

It was obvious that people wanted to take the initiative to go dancing, but none of them seemed to have the courage to make the first move and instead waited for someone to be the first pair to move in whose example they could then follow.

Lamashtu glanced at Rain and smiled apologetically. "I'll borrow the captain from you for a moment, dear. You understand, right? Like he said, it's for the sake of the tribes."

Before Rain could reply, Lamashtu and Razoul had already left her behind. The crowd followed the Sarquil pair's example and filled the dance floor quickly like a rising tide just like Lamashtu had suspected now that the ice had been broken.

"Razoul...what has gone into you?" the raven-haired girl muttered, looking in disbelief how the black captain she loved so much had once again abandoned her without even saying a word to her. Although she was in the middle of a crowd full of happy people, she had never felt so miserable and lonely in her life.

Frosty the Snowman

Along the side of the road, Leon spotted what appeared to be a snowman. It had a corn-cob pipe, buttons for eyes, and a carrot for a nose. The arms were fashioned out of twigs. Whoever had made the snowman was nowhere to be seen.

The strange thing about it was the felt top hat that was hanging on a tree next to it. It looked expensive, not at all the sort of thing that someone would just leave lying around. Leon jumped up and inspected it closely. It was in excellent shape, and probably worth a respectable amount of silver. On an impulse, he placed it on the snowman's head.

Leon leaped back in alarm as the snowman suddenly smiled and began to dance around.

"Hi, everybody," it said in a cheerful voice, "I'm Fro--"

"HOLY SHIT, IT CAME TO LIFE! SHOOT IT! SHOOT IT!" shouted Leon in panic.

"Wait," it said, "I'm a friendl--AARGH! MY EYE! MY FUCKING EYE! Augh! No! Stop shoot--urk!"

As soon as Frosty hit the ground, Leon started kicking snow all over the place, and lit the top hat on fire.

It had been a close call.

Ghostbusters

Example 1

"What do you have in mind, Master Balthazar?" Councillor Gertrude asked. "This magic spreading from the cleric will soon grow too strong for even us to handle even though Councillor Malek is doing his best to keep things under control."

"I've experienced a similar phenomenon in the past when I worked in the Grey Cult. Although I've seen the light since those dark days, High Prophet Xerathas did teach the cult some useful tricks, one of which should help us today," Balthazar replied. "All high-level mages here must pool their magic together into a single beam of mana and shoot it at the cleric."

"That's presposterous! Every mage worth his license knows that one should never cross the beams!" Councillor Malek gasped. "It would cause untold destruction if so many high-level mages tried to do that!"

Example 2

The crystal shook all of a sudden and shattered. The warm liquid touched Ronald and Mary, and the pair turned to see what was going on.

A man emerged from the shattered crystal and walked towards them. He stopped in front of the naked pair, and his dark eyes focused on the girl.

"Are you a god?" the man asked.

"Uhh...no?" Mary muttered, confused by this sudden turn of events. She blinked and quickly added: "My Pa makes some godly fried chicken though--"

"Then...DIE!" the man growled in response and drew out his sword in the blink of an eye. Before the pair could react, he decapitated the girl with one clean swing.

Gilda

It was then Raul's recognizable voice suddenly spoke, interrupting the girl's thoughts. "Haruko, I've got a man here who would like to ask you some questions for him and his fellow's research into your family, we're trying to trace what happened to them," he said. "Are you decent?"

Haruko glanced at her white kimono, noticing to her surprise that she hadn't quite tied it up properly when she had exited the hot spring in a hurry and that it was showing some cleavage.

Adulterer!

"Me? Sure. I'm...decent," the girl answered Raul's inquiry and quickly adjusted the kimono to cover herself up properly while trying to ignore the accusatory voice in her head, the voice which made her heart ache all of a sudden.

The Grey

Jacob's eyes focused ahead while ignoring the Scun's comment. "That voice, faint as it is, sounds oddly...familiar," he muttered, gripping his sword. "Could it be a trap, though?"

"Only one way to find out," Jason smirked and motioned at Jacob and the mob. "A song echoes around us; it must be a sign! As the bards of old once sang, it's time to go once more into the fray, into the last good fight we'll ever know."

Guild Wars 2

"There's something in the wateeeeer~! Help!" one of the pirates, a bloated man who looked somewhat frog-like, yelled, pointing at a dark shape he had noticed beneath the waves in the middle of the spot surrounded by the ships.

"Brothers, sisters, ready yourselves! Tequatl--I mean, the beast is here!" another pirate with exotic features, which made Varalia think of the Mahican people she had seen in Aison during the Yamato Empire's campaign there, continued. "To the cannons, now!"

At that moment, the sea serpent rose from the water head-first in all its scaly glory with a mighty splash, its jaws reaching for the now glowing Dusk.

Hamlet

Example 1

"Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Leraje: a fellow of infinite bravery, a most excellent opponent," Ronove heard himself saying as he gazed into the eyes of a severed warrior's head which he held in his hand.

The tattooed man, Leraje, rolled his eyes. "Why do you always have be so fucking melodramatic every time you kill someone you deem 'worthy'? You're embarrassing me!"

Example 2

Ronove regained his senses and looked around. People were still chasing those pesky sand gnomes. His head hurt like it always did when he had these flashes, but he had got used to it by now.

He quickly saw the skull, which he had dubbed Yorick to honour whoever that person was he had seen in the flashback. Before the sand gnomes could carry it further, he snatched it from them and moved away while the gnomes hissed menacingly at him.

He smiled at the skull. "Reunited again, buddy! Now then, to hide you from those meanies or not to hide you, that is the question..."

Happy Days / Robocop

Detective-Lieutenant Arthur Fonzarelli of the Royal Citadel Mounted Police was not happy. First Pronin, and now de Ardyn. Could security not prevent murders from happening right under their own noses? And now the Citadel was lousy with SAVAGE--and the worst kind of SAVAGE to boot. ED loved to swoop in and snatch Fonzie's cases out from under him. There was nothing he could do about it, since they had national jurisdiction. This time, though, it would be different. Maar Sul was his city, and it was time to clean it up. This time, he'd be sure it wasn't ED that did the cleaning. They'd buggered up the Pronin investigation, and they'd bugger this one up, too.

This case wouldn't be solved by ED. This took savoir faire, and it could only be done by one man--The Fonz. He was half Scun...half Maar Sulais...all cop. There were only three things he trusted: his instincts, his service dagger, and his pet monkey Ted.

He slammed his service dagger into its holster at his side. "Come on, Ted," he said in a menacing growl. "It's time to...clean house."

Hellraiser

"So...the prodigal daughter returns home at long last," a chilly voice echoed in the chamber, followed by two red and brightly glowing eyes which stared at the pair from atop the mound. The shadowy shape stirred and descended towards the trespassers slowly but surely, each step being noticeable and inevitable like death that a dying person knew would be near. As the light hit the shadow with glowing eyes, it revealed a voluptuous, dark-haired woman clad in a green armor which accentuated her figure.

"Help me. The pain, it's...too much. Please...help...me..." a weary voice whimpered in agony in front of the pair, and they noticed something in the shape of a man which turned out to be a robed mage bound to a pillar. The spectre given form stopped near the captive, a hand with sharp nails caressing the man's exposed chest which, as the light from her eyes illuminated it, was revealed to be torn open by hooks, and yet the man could somehow still breathe and stay concious, let alone being alive.

The spectre's hand moved to the man's cheek, wiping off a tear that was running down and then putting the finger in her mouth. "Shh, dear. No tears, please; it's a waste of good suffering. I still have such sights to show you and your treacherous kind with my magic and flesh. Trust me, little war-mongering child of Nergal. Some pain has to be endured, and that makes the pleasures that follow so much...sweeter," a purring voice came from the spectre before she gave a soft kiss on the mage's lips. "Your Alentian and Sarquil brothers and sisters will share these sensations in due time. Just listen to their voices mixed with my children. Can you hear them too? What beautiful music they make..."

The raven-haired woman looked at the scene unfolding in front of her. "Mother...it really is you. So the Duchess has finally reached your heart," she addressed the spectre which was shaped like a woman quietly and knelt down, bowing her head. "Welcome home...Dreadlady."

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

The anvil fell down. Some people said that one of the great mysteries of life was whether objects such as anvils were capable of rational thought. Most common folk, and most mages, thought the whole idea was absurd, but there were some supporters to this theory which was known as Intelligent Design (named after the fact that all crafted items had been designed by someone and that these items could be capable of thought and would thus be 'intelligent'). If people had been around to witness this particular anvil falling down and had somehow tried to sense any possible auras around the anvil, they would've realized that the anvil didn't think of anything while it was falling down. Even if this concrete evidence had been presented to the supporters of Intelligent Design, the supporters would've just said that this particular anvil was an anomaly and that the rest of the anvils would still be capable of rational thought.

Sirus looked up in the sky and noticed the flying dragon. "I wish I could kick that beast in the balls," the dark elf murmured and wondered if dragons even had balls. Suddenly he heard a sound coming from above. He looked up again and saw something big coming down. Before Sirus could react, an anvil fell on his head, crushing his skull and killing him instantly.

In This Moment

With each step he took deeper into Threshold, Omaroch slowly became more and more awake--as if he'd been in a deep sleep until now--and more aware of his surroundings than ever before. It had been a long time since he'd felt this alive.

He knew something wasn't right as it suddenly became much easier to traverse in the labyrinthine alleys. It was as if this shadowy Alentian district itself was now guiding his steps towards his destination: an old, crumbling tower in the middle of Threshold.

A gentle, warm breeze hit his face, and it was almost as if the wind itself was whispering sweetly: "Please find me and save me..."

The councillor shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts of these illusions which were both visual and verbal. They were nothing but lingering shadows which would disperse at the first light of dawn.

He slowed down once he'd reached the dark tower. He walked to the door, feeling the heat through the walls and smelling the burning inside. His clawed hand shook slightly, and he took a deep breath as he opened the door and entered the beating heart of this pulsating darkness.

"The fires are growing close, and all I smell is smoke. Still, it's beautiful to me. I hope you get here soon; I've been waiting here for you. I...believed in you..."

As Omaroch stepped inside, all he could see in the dark were eerie green flames--real or not, it didn't matter because this was the heart of Threshold where your dreams and nightmares could become reality in the blink of an eye if you so wished--which were flickering and dancing around him in an oddly serene way.

He moved towards the stairs which would lead him to the upper level of the tower, and all he could think of was that he was here alone and he'd have to face what awaited him within all by himself. He felt like his skin was peeling off, as if his body was on fire. Yet it was all in his head...or was it, anymore? Perhaps all of this was real, had been real all along, after all...

"So hurry, please. There are flames around me. Please come and save me..."

Omaroch tensed. This was the third time he'd heard that same echoing voice since he'd entered Threshold. It sounded like...no, it couldn't be. Threshold had to be playing tricks with his mind even in this tower...no, especially in this tower where the district's dark, distorting magic originated from. He had to hurry before he'd succumb to the shadows' temptations. He had to remain strong...for her sake.

After what felt like a lifetime, he finally reached the end of the stairs: the highest level of the tower. It was as if the walls themselves were alive, like he was within a womb ready to give birth. It was unsettling yet oddly...comforting as well.

The councillor readied himself and dove into the deepest darkness, only to freeze when his demonic eyes focused on the pale figure who was standing half cloaked in shadow and other half covered in dim starlight which was coming in from the balcony. The figure's white dress was in stark contrast with the darkness of the tower and made her stand out like a flame in the night.

She was the source of the voice, and she was singing in a voice Omaroch knew all too well and used the lyrics of a song from a lifetime ago:

"Even if the world ignites into flames

you'll be right here by my side.

And as it burns away,

you smile at me and say..."

Omaroch faltered. It was as if his very life had been sucked from him in an instant in a way even Malphas's torture hadn't been able to do. His heart both sank and leapt at the same time, and he felt like he was being torn apart from within. His red eyes were filled with burning tears and his throat became dry as the pale figure turned to look at him while her long, blond hair fluttered freely in the gentle breeze.

"...that not even death could take me away from you," the woman concluded quietly while having a melancholic smile on her face. Her voice was no longer an abstract echo; this time it was solid. It was...real. "Welcome home, my love."

Inspector Gadget

The barkeep could barely suppress a grin as he heard the phrase Erikur had used. "Some people sure have weird hobbies nowadays. Ya know the saying about not looking into a gift horse's mouth? Well, sharks tend to be much more prone to bite a too curious head off than horses do, that's fo' sho'."

"Well, this is the Shark's Tooth tavern which a...friend of mine mentioned, so I decided to take a look around," Erikur said. "But perhaps I was mistaken, and--"

"Hold yer horses, lad!" the barkeep grunted. "What did ya say? Shark's Tooth? Ya got it wrong: this is Shark's Maw...ya must've mixed up the name with something else. In fact, the sign above the tavern should've said as much!"

Erikur frowned. "The sign specifically said Shark's Tooth, not Maw."

"Gosh darn it! Must've been Gadget's rascals again, making their own signs and putting them up there just to spite us honest people who merely want to make a living! Now I have to go and replace the sign all over again!" the barkeep growled and shook his fist to the heavens in an overly dramatic motion. "I'll get ya next time, Gadget!"

Iron Maiden

Black flowers began sprouting from the monster's bark-like skin and spread their pollen in the air while the power of the wisp and the treant had become one with his. "I see we have guests incoming, my pets," he continued in a slithery tone as he saw the charge of Osmond's Light Brigade. "Show them the hospitality of these woods while I feast on their anguish and despair as I snuff out whatever hope they have left. The pollen of the flowers has affected you earlier...and now I shall regain control over you. Let Fear consume you whole as the Symphony of Terror comes out of your fleshy little mouths! I am Fear Dearg, the far darrig...and my power is ever-growing!"

The eye sockets on his skull-like face began burning with blue fire as his voice turned deeper, almost melodic. "The unknown troubles on your mind, maybe your mind is playing tricks. You sense, and suddenly eyes fix on dancing shadows from behind..."

"Fear of the Dark..." McCain and Romney groaned, as did several other people from the mob while the pollen of the dark flowers fell on them.

Combined with the pollen they had been exposed to earlier from dark flowers in the woods when they had first reached Befana's cottage, the effect was enough to turn their bloodshot eyes black as they turned almost passively at Osmond's group that was approaching them.

And then, the possessed mob charged at the group with surprising speed, no longer slumbering like before, while they chanted in unison: "Fear of the Daaaark! I have a phobia that someone's always there!"

Kingdom of Heaven

Khalid stood still, and eerie silence surrounded him. Then that silence was broken by a cry, or rather a howl so cruel that it even chilled many tough guards to the bone. "I'm going to cut you into little pieces, you son of a bitch! Soon you'll wish you'd never been born!" the Sultan hissed, and his voice grew from a whisper to a loud roar. He reached for his scimitars and looked like he was ready to jump off the wall and run after the Dreadlord who had by now returned to the army.

A strong hand landed on the Sultan's shoulder. "No," Razoul said in an emotionless and yet authoritative tone. "I promised my father to keep you safe, so I'm not letting you run to a certain death like some fool."

"You dare defy me, your lord?" Khalid spat and punched Razoul. "Ismail was like a father to me, goddamn it! And by Tronin's beard, he was your father! How can you say something like that even though you saw what that bastard did to him? I'm not just going to sit here with my thumb in my ass while that fucker gets away!"

"This is just the beginning, and your people expect to see you lead them to victory against the odds," Razoul replied calmly. "You're the father of the Sarquil tribes, my lord. Showing weakness is unacceptable." He turned to nearby archers. "Shoot the imps before they cause any more damage."

Arrows rained down from the sky and landed on the imps who fell one by one. However, one survived and defiantly threw Ismail's helmet at an archer. Razoul grabbed the helmet midair before it reached its intended target and threw a dagger at the imp that had crept too close to the wall. Once the imps had fallen, there was not much left of the proud captain's corpse except for a few chunks of flesh and bones as well as the severed head which was still stuck in a spear.

Khalid's eyes moved from the grisly scene to the massive army of undulating red that stood there in the horizon like a force of nature. Then he turned to Razoul, tears filling his proud eyes perhaps for the first time in a long while as he realized the futility of it all.

"You're a monster," the Sultan whispered to the black man, his voice cracking. He clenched his fists and had to lean on the wall for support.

Razoul's fingers wandered absent-mindedly on the surface of his father's bloodstained Ebony Helmet. "I am what I am. Someone has to be," he muttered and turned to the guards.

Lady Gaga

Jono smiled. "Gentlemen, and... gentle--uh--worm, this is just one big misunderstanding. Surely someone so wise and powerful such as yourself wouldn't use such a lowly tactic as shoot us?"

The dragonoid seemed to consider this for a moment and narrowed its snakelike eyes. "Yesss... why should I waste my ammo on cretins such as yourself? If you truly are as innocent as you claim to be, there's only one way to settle this... poetry competition!"

Refan's eyes grew wide. "Poetry? POETRY?! Oh dear Cardia please no! Anything but that!" He turned to Jono, hoping that the resourceful swordsman would figure out a way to save them from this tricky predicament.

"Enough girlish hysterics, Refan! I need quiet to think."

"But I wasn't--"

Jono let out a loud shush, and shook his finger vigorously in a random direction. He could imagine his companion off to the side, shaking like a girl, weeping silently and biting his nails. The sad bastard. He guessed it was up to him to save the day once again. It was then that he reached out with his senses, tapping into the strangest facet of his Innate Ability, a more powerful connection to the supernatural plane than your average joe. Searching through the voices of the dead, he tried to pinpoint one to come to his aid in this nefarious contest. Suddenly he was touched by the voice and shade of noble lady, her aura enveloping Jono in warm sensations. She whispered in his ear, and he repeated aloud:

"Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah!

Roma-Roma-ma-ah!

Ga-ga-ooh-la-la!

Want your bad romance."

After several minutes more of this poetry, Jono slowly felt the lady leave him. He was alone in silence until he heard the Lindworm sniff, and begin weeping.

"It's so beautiful! My apologies, friends. No one with such genius could be a thief."

The Last Unicorn

"What do you want?" Izael hissed, careful not to raise his voice.

Thrax smiled. "Oh, it's the other way around, Izael. The real question is: what do you want? Follow the Master's orders to the bitter end, or live happily ever after with your true love?"

Izael bit his lip but remained silent. Thrax always turned questions upside down, and the most unnerving thing was that he always hit the mark, finding your weak spot.

"Good. That's all the information I need," the Totenkopf said. "You may keep your lips sealed, but the rest of your body has betrayed you. A pace, a glance, a turn of the head, the flash of your throat as you breathe... even your way of standing perfectly still--they were all my spies."

The Legend of Zelda CD-i Games

Razravkar left. His stomach was grumbling.

It didn't take him long to find someplace to eat. Harkinian's Dinner, said the sign. Razravkar shrugged and walked in.

The rotund blond owner laughed as Razravkar entered. "Ho ho ho! I wonder what's for dinner!"

"I'll have the chicken."

"Mai boi, this chicken is what all true warriors strive for!"

It was at that moment Marisa wandered in. "Razravkar? Is that you?"

"No idea what you're talking about."

"I have a tricycle and some explosives."

It was then that Razravkar's visions came again. Nothing he did mattered. He was too weak - too weak -

Clutching his head, he closed his eyes.

It was not Razravkar who opened them again.

Running outside, he found the tricycle with explosives strapped to it. How convenient. Furiously pedaling down the street toward Etemenanki, he cried "MAI BOY, THIS IS WHAT ALL TRUE WARRIORS STRIVE FOR!!!!!!!"

The tricycle hit the ziggurat at a moderate speed, detonating the explosives and killing the necromancer instantly.

Life of Brian

As they continued their trek, they suddenly heard singing nearby:

Some things in life are bad

They can really make you mad

Other things just make you swear and curse.

When you're chewing on life's gristle

Don't grumble, give a whistle

And this'll help things turn out for the best...

Cal Rissian smirked. "While we're here, I might as well keep my other end of the bargain. I did promise to show you what's been going on in your absence, dearest Bella. Let's head to the left. You'll see what I mean soon enough."

They entered the market square, seeing several people buying various products from merchants who were braving the weather. What caught the group's attention was not this sight but something else entirely: they saw a red-haired man, a dwarf from the looks of things, in a pillory with laughing children passing by and throwing spoiled tomatoes and other fruits at him, sometimes hitting his face while several adults looked on with looks of disdain or perhaps even delight on their faces. He had a cap tied to his head, with what looked like donkey ears attached to it. Next to this somewhat comedic yet sad display stood a sign which read:

HERE LIES SOMEONE WHO MADE AN ASS OUT OF HIMSELF

SO HENCEFORTH HE SHALL BE TREATED WORSE THAN AN ASS

HE FAILED THIS CITY AND DISRESPECTED THE WILL OF THE PEOPLE

HE GOT WHAT HE DESERVED, FAIR AND SQUARE

GLORY TO LOSSTAROT, OUR JUST RULER, NOW AND FOREVERMORE

The red-haired dwarf-man roared, whether from anger or madness was hard to say as he tried to break free from the pillory but in vain while the crowd laughed and sneered at him. "Laugh while you still can! Once I get free, I'm going to set this piece of shit town ablaze, starting from that damn crow inn and its innkeep! Mark my words, you will hear from me again!"

Four bards stood nearby, playing their instruments while one of them, a funny-looking man, sang with great joy although his singing was so bad that even tone-deaf people would be offended. However, the melody was still clear enough thanks to his comrades' much better playing skills.

If life seems jolly rotten

There's something you've forgotten

And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.

When you're feeling in the dumps

Don't be silly, chumps

Just purse your lips and whistle--That's the thing!

The bards began whistling in unison, surprisingly on key compared to the more off-key melody their lead singer was singing. Several crowd members joined in on the whistling of the rather catchy tune.

"What is this all about?" Bella asked, raising an eyebrow. "What has that poor dwarf done to deserve this?"

"That fella over there, Gorilla Shitcrapper or whatever, decided to anger the wrong people in this town some time ago. Attacked some Coalition soldiers before he was caught. Took quite a few people to bring him down, or so I've heard. The Coalition doesn't tolerate anyone undermining its authority, so they devised a punishment worse than death for this murderer to make a point to anyone thinking of opposing the Coalition so openly again," Cal Rissian explained. "They put him in a pillory for all of Reign to see and where he would be shamed by the worst bard band in our fair homeland: the Monty Pythons. The joke is that the Pythons actually think they're hot stuff while everyone else knows how god-awful they are. Heck, their lead singer Eric Idle's way of singing is now colloquially referred to as 'idling', that's how phenomenally bad it is! At least this song is somewhat memorable, though..."

Life's a piece of shit

When you look at it

Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true.

You'll see it's all a show

Keep 'em laughing as you go

Just remember that the last laugh is on you!

The prisoner roared, and his furious eyes looked around until noticing the group. He bared his teeth and glared straight at Arcturius. "Mark my words! I'm coming for you all!" His sentence ended in another roar as a child approached him from behind and spanked him in the ass with a twig, giggling as she hit her mark. Coalition soldiers standing guard laughed out loud at the farce they had set up, pointing at the dwarf-man being shamed and whispering to each other while the bards continued their song's chorus lines with whistling in between:

Always look on the bright side of life

Always look on the bright side of death

Just before you draw your terminal breath...

The funny-looking lead singer, Eric Idle, enjoyed the audience's reaction and couldn't restrain himself while his co-bards continued singing the chorus. "I mean, what have you got to lose?" he asked in his nasal voice as he patted the prisoner on the head in an almost fatherly manner. "You know, you come from nothing. You're going back to nothing. What have you lost? Nothing!"

"Always worth a laugh, that Idling Eric is!" Cal Rissian chuckled. "Alright, enough theatrics for now. Let's move it so we can get the fair lady home safe and sound."

The Little Mermaid

Jason followed the light for a time and finally reached what appeared to be a meadow. His eyes immediately noticed a brook and farther ahead its source: a serene spring surrounded by pillars which had long since crumbled into ruins and become mossy and were now the only visible reminders of whatever had originally been built there.

He could now see the source of light from earlier: it appeared to be a green ball of flickering fire which floated above the spring, a will-o'-the-wisp. As he observed this strange sight, he suddenly heard a beautiful voice singing somewhere nearby:

What would I give to live where you are?

What would I pay to stay here beside you?

What would I do to see you smiling at me?

Jason's eyes turned to where the voice was coming from, and he finally noticed who had been singing. There was a girl sitting on a rock near the spring with her back turned to him and seemed to be cooling off her toes and splashing the water playfully every once in a while. She was combing her dark, wavy hair, and her smooth, ebony skin was barely covered in green leaves which didn't do much to hide her curves. The girl continued her song but this time she was almost humming it, which sounded sweet like a cat purring:

Where would we walk,

Where would we run,

If we could stay all day in the sun?

Just you and me

And I could be

Part of your world!

A long-forgotten ruins in the middle of a forest, a serene spring and brook, a black girl probably close to Jason's age based on her voice sitting on a rock with barely any clothes on while looking at a green ball of fire...it was a weird combination. What was a lone girl doing out here on her own? Had she got lost in these woods and had sought refuge in the soothing light of that will-'o-the-wisp? She sounded so calm, as calm as the forest itself.

The girl's voice continued, now even more quiet and anxious than before but still audible to Jason who also heard a strange longing in her melody:

I don't know when,

I don't know how,

But I know something's starting right now.

Watch and you'll see,

Someday I'll be

Part of your world...

The lyrics of the girl's song faded, and she began humming while combing her hair, her back still turned to Jason, which is why the boy couldn't see her face clearly.

It was then the boy heard the rustling in the foliage behind him and what sounded like faint whispering before it faded away. The girl hadn't reacted to it nor had she noticed his presence, or she hadn't heard it because she was humming to herself. Or was it all just in Jason's mind?

Looney Tunes

"I knew I should've listened to my hunch! We should've taken that left turn at Albuquerque Street. It would've led us straight to the captain." Ying Zi pouted but suddenly cheered up and pulled out a gem from her pocket.

Lost

Besides, there was one more, far more weighty reason for the greater demon to stay put. He knew from experience that if he left to do some chores while his orbs' channels were showing interesting stuff, he'd end up missing the good parts. After not being able to watch the final vision of "Lost (and Regained) Memories" which had provided some crazy plot twists late in the summer season (black smoke be damned!), he had made sure not to repeat that mistake again. More than almost anything, he wanted to see events unfold in the prime time slot and be the first one to tell the juicy news to others immediately afterwards.

McDonalds

Ronald McDonald grinned as he saw Mary undress herself in moonlight. It was warm outside at night even here in the north in Ciano, the town of love. The pair had chosen a wheat field to consummate their relationship. The location was out of sight; a necessary precaution because Colonel Sanders, the wealthy merchant famous throughout Libaterra for his fried chicken, would be less than pleased to learn that a minstrel clown would be sleeping with his "untouchable" daughter tonight.

"Show me your Big Mac," Mary giggled as she began pulling off the clown's trousers.

The clown pushed the naked girl to the ground, savouring every moment as his eyes feasted on her body. He felt her trembling as he placed himself on top of her. "You're that ecstatic already, eh? Don't worry, Uncle Ronald will let you drink his McFlurry once we've had some fun first--"

Memento

Gekrepten sat in her cell and stared at the wall. "How did it end up like this?" she asked herself out loud.

"Well," replied the guard outside. "I'd say the wall ended up like that mostly because of neglect. We don't really get janitors to clean the cells I suppose, seems like a waste of time really. And all that moss ended up there because of all the dampness. Dampness creates moss y'know. Yeah, moss'll do that to a wall. It's that hole in the roof y'see, y'know, where the water comes through. Yeah, whenever it rains the water seeps through and..."

Gekrepten sighed, ignoring the guard. "How did it all end up like this?"

Three years earlier...

Gekrepten stood in front of the castle in Myridia. In all honesty she didn't think this would work, but she was desperate, so she set off in order to meet with the king.

Two months earlier...

Makoto was enjoying his banana crepes when something at the window caught his attention. Looking over, he saw there was a carpie just outside, and it had something in its beak. Makoto hurried over to the window and saw it was carrying an envelope so he took it out and opened it up. Inside he found a letter and a picture. “The king! It worked! We are saved!”

Makoto did a double take and looked at the letter again. "...hot...body???"

Three minutes earlier...

Temporarily blinded, the eagle had no choice but to abort the attack, leaving the carpie to escape, only now the carpie was completely lost. The carpie bird decided it needed some R and R, so it headed down for the forest and settled down on a window sill. "Mmm...banana crepes..." it thought.

Five minutes earlier...

As the carpie flew into a clearing, an eagle quickly descended upon him, the eagle's talons narrowly missing the carpie's body. The carpie dodged and evaded the attacking eagle for a while but the carpie knew that it wouldn't be able to dodge forever. With this in mind, the carpie suddenly ascended and then positioned itself over the eagle, and then used its only form attack. It did a big sloshy poop on the eagle’s head.

Ten minutes earlier...

"Why the hell did you do that?" the officer demanded. "Don't you know that's one of the worst crimes you can commit in this country?"

"I...it was an accident," Thomas replied.

"Oh yeah, well that's for the courts to decide!"

The officer was approached by a soldier. "We found something in the beak, sir."

"What is it?" asked the officer.

"Well there’s a picture of a naked lady and...a note."

"I'll take the picture," the officer said. "I’ll give it a thorough examination later. Now what does the note say? Read it out."

The soldier looked around, embarrassed. "Ooh ooh ahh eee chikka chikka bikko bokkity boo, sir."

Three minutes earlier...

Thomas examined the bow that was sitting outside on the table. Picking it up, he realised it was elven. He always wanted to shoot an elven bow, so he did. He shot an arrow into the air. Unfortunately for Thomas, a carpie happened to be occupying that air. I guess unfortunately for the carpie too, seeing as how it plummeted to the ground and died. Though Thomas really was the unfortunate one here, seeing as he had just committed one of the worst crimes in Aison, right in the middle of the annual law enforcement Mardi Gras.

Six minutes earlier, in Reno...

Vauldorf checked the letter again, before he gave it to the carpie.

It read:

Well, how do like my new look? I did it just for you, you know. We'll have to meet up sometime, but don't come to me, I'll come to you.

P.S. I bet you can't resist my hot body now!

Vauldorf smirked to himself as he put the letter and a picture of himself into the carpie’s beak. "Hehehe, with this new haircut, Sarah will be putty in my hands!"

Vauldorf watched as the carpie flew off and left Reno. Then Vauldorf realised he had written the whole letter in monkey language. "CRAP!"

Eight minutes earlier...

Vauldorf got a haircut.

Twelve minutes earlier, at the Magestar...

Gekrepten hurriedly put the message and the picture into the carpie and then sent it on its way. Now she just had to get out of the Magestar unseen, and everything would have worked out perfectly.

Twenty minutes earlier...

The woman looked in the mirror and studied her face. It had worked. She noticed something engraved into the glass of the mirror – "Gekrepten Glassworks." The woman then grabbed a piece of paper and some ink, and quickly began to sketch.

Seven minutes earlier...

"I need to go to the toilet," Henry said to the other guard. "I'll be back in a sec."

"I need to go too," said the other guard.

Henry groaned and walked off to the toilet, with the other guard following behind.

Mungo-Mungo took this opportunity to sneak into the room. Inside there were many scrolls and potions, and soon Mungo-Mungo found the one he was looking for.

The label read:

"Polymorphism. If accidentally swallowed consult a doctor/vet, depending on symptoms."

Mungo-Mungo took a swig of the potion and suddenly felt a change begin inside his body.

Six minutes earlier...

Mungo-Mungo navigated the hallways of the Magestar, until he came across the room he was looking for. Unfortunately, two soldiers were standing guard outside it.

"You need to go to the toilet, Henry?" asked one of the soldiers.

"No," Henry replied.

"Neither do I," the other soldier replied.

"Are you sure?" Henry asked. "Because you always seem to need to go when I do."

"...no I don't."

Thirty minutes earlier...

King Mungo-Mungo Coconuts Boonana XXXIII looked up at the Magestar in awe. He had finally made it. If everything went to plan, Monkey Land would be saved.

Sixty-Nine years earlier...

"Congratulations, you've got a beautiful baby boy." The midwife handed the baby to the mother. "What will you call him?"

"Vauldorf," the mother replied, smiling at her baby.

"Can I have a hold?" the father asked.

The mother nodded and sat up to hand over the baby. She leaned forward but she lost her grip and dropped the baby on its head on the ground.

Mrs Springer looked around the room nervously. "Surely one little drop on the head can't hurt him, can it?"

Metal Gear Solid Series

Example 1

Zib was walking through the large mansion of Dreadlord Ronove, doing his duty. That is, he was collecting garbage. It wasn't a proud job, or so the high class demons seemed to remind him every day, but it was a necessary one. Do any of them even know how much garbage they create? Zib was tired of it all, yet he would do his duty, one gnawed bone and cake boxes at the time.

There did seem to be an awful lot of cake boxes left around lately. He idly wondered from bin to bin as he suddenly heard a sound.

"Sneak.. Sneak.. Sneak.."

When the demon looked around the corner he saw a wooden box. Now this wasn't out of the ordinary, but there was something different. the box was moving in the direction of the Dreadlord's room, and the sound seemed to be coming from the box.

"Sneak.. Sneak.. Sneak..", the girlish voice came from the box.

"You know..." said Zib slowly, "I don't think you're supposed to say sneak."

The box squealed in surprise and the movements seemed to quicken.

"Sneak sneak sneak sneak sneak sneak."

Well, at least it was less loud. He should probably raise the alarm, and then they would question and mock him for doing nothing himself. Was he even getting paid enough for this?

...Wait, was he even getting paid?

"Screw this," Zib said and went off to do his daily round to collect the trash that seemed to accumulate near that one exited little demon's catapult.

Example 2

"I'd like to call this Operation Snake Eater of our ongoing Leather Gear Solid campaign. You know, since many of us wear leather armor and all..."

Several Black Hunters groaned audibly. "Here Hideo Kojima goes again with his leather fetish. Can't you be more conservative with your crazy names?" a hunter complained. "Operation Snake Eater, really? Next thing you tell me an operation following that will be called Operation Trouser Snake or Operation Morning Wood. Or how about a fucking Peace Walker since we're all walking around this damn countryside bringing peace and harmony wherever we go?"

Hideo blushed. "Well, as a matter of fact I was actually thinking of using Operation Peace Walker for a future mission, along with Phantom Pain since we'll bring pain to demons while moving unseen like phantoms..."

Moulin Rouge

The lights on the candeliers and torches suddenly dimmed on their own, likely with the use of magic. Unithien squeezed her eyes, trying to figure out what was going on and why the pirates had quieted down so quickly.

And then, from somewhere in the shadows, a soft yet clear voice began singing:

"Maar Sulais are glad to die for love.

They delight in fighting duels..."

A beam of light suddenly shot upwards, and the pirates turned their sober, somewhat drunken or very drunken eyes (depending on the individual) on the ceiling where they saw a blond woman in a blue velvet dress sitting on a gilded chair which levitated down with magic.

"But I prefer a pirate who lives

And gives expensive jewels!"

And then, all of a sudden, the singing woman stood up on the chair, jumped down and landed on two feet in a way which looked quite risky yet surprisingly elegant. At the same time her voice grew louder, and the red curtains pulled aside in a grand fashion, revealing a glittering, elaborate stage full of women who wore skimpy, feathery costumes and held delicate fans and hats.

To add to the revelation, the lone woman's voice was now joined with notes coming from below...the pit beneath the stage which Unithien had seen earlier. She now understood its purpose: that's where an entire band was apparently playing. The rhythm of the song turned from a reflective one into a more passionate, urgent version with only a few beats in between.

"A kiss on the hand

May be quite continental,

But diamonds are a girl's best friend."

The blond woman was now on stage, and her dress, which sparkled under the magical light, had drawn Unithien's attention to it. It enhanced the woman's slim, fit body, accentuating her curves and being almost so thin that you could see through it, and that visual alone nearly made Unithien blush. Even when she had acted in as seductive manner as she could, it was nothing compared to this woman's flawless, flirting moves as if her whole body was aflame with pure passion.

"A kiss may be grand

But it won't pay the rental

On your humble flat

Or help you feed your...mmm...pussy cat!"

The singer mimicked a cat clawing with her hand and almost moaned her last words as she placed her other hand close to her nether regions before she suddenly fell down on all fours and began moving towards a table of pirates in a very seductive manner. Unithien almost wanted to avert her eyes, and yet she couldn't help but keep watching this show which was unlike anything she'd seen in Remon.

"Men grow cold

As girls grow old,

And we all lose our charms in the end..."

The singing woman was now almost on a pirate's lap, openly flirting with him and moving her lips dangerously close to the flustered drunk man. Just as the pirate was about to grab her and kiss her, she playfully pulled his hat right on his face and pushed him forward, making the pirate fall down, while she also caught a diamond he had been holding in his hand. The act was followed with bellowing laughter from other pirates and muffled curses from the unlucky pirate.

"But square-cut or pear-shaped,

These rocks don't lose their shape.

Diamonds are a girl's best friend!"

The singer raised her hand, now holding the stolen diamond, and held it victoriously so all people in the audience could see it. Many pirates, particularly the drunk ones, began whistling and howling like a pack of wolves on the hunt. Unithien could've sworn that some pirates' tongues had actually turned so long that they had hit the floor while their eyes were fixed on the sexy temptress who was luring them on with her song.

"Come and get me, boys!" the woman giggled, delighting in the audience's reactions while the pit band accentuated her words with very teasing bit of music...or at least that's how it sounded to Unithien's ears.

"Talk to us Velvet-chan, tell us all about it!" another female voice shouted in an excited tone. Unithien turned her eyes to the source of this new voice and saw the dark-haired woman with the golden headpiece from before, who was now sitting on Kuro Tori's lap, clapping her hands.

"Talk to us, Velvet-chan, tell us all about it!" many pirates joined the elegant woman as their eyes turned back to the singer clad in blue.

The singer, Velvet it seemed, smiled in response and placed the diamond in her cleavage while she took a suggestive pose.

"There may come a time

When a lass needs a lawyer,

But diamonds are a girl's best friend."

The woman then began walking on all fours again as she approached another table, and Unithien couldn't help but blush at her blunt yet oddly teasing moves and how the diamond hadn't fallen off yet from her skimpy, elegant dress.

"There may come a time

When a hard-boiled employer

Thinks you're awful nice..."

Velvet had now reached the table and quickly slid onto the lap of one of the pirates there before anyone in the table realized what was going on. Much to Unithien's surprise the bearded pirate who had caught the singer's attention was quite familiar: it was Susumu, the man who had introduced himself to Unithien, offered her advice and held her hand earlier!

Velvet's lips moved closer to Susumu, and she had a sultry look in her eyes and even her lips looked inviting while her hands moved towards his chest. She then suddenly used the momentum of the movement to push herself up and left the pirate's lap while finishing her line with:

"...But get that ice or else NO DICE!"

She stood on the stage again, once more holding the diamond from before in her hand. Several audience members howled and whistled even louder this time and now even threw coins, jewels and gilded statues on the stage while the singer took it all in with a delightful look on her ever so teasing face.

"Time rolls on,

And youth is gone,

And you can't straighten up when you bend..."

Velvet then turned her attention to the table where Kuro Tori's entourage was sitting. She winked at the Pirate King as she continued:

"But stiff back

Or stiff knees,

You stand straight at...Big Daddy's!"

She then encompassed the entire Corsair's Grin with her gaze and mannerisms. She had won over her audience, and she knew it while savouring every moment with an almost blissful yet still teasing look in her fiery eyes.

The song reached its rumbling climax as the choir of women and the pit band played the melody out loud while her voice still overpowered them all somehow:

"Diamonds! Diamonds!

I don't mean fool's gold!

But diamonds...are a girl's...best...friend~!"

The song ended in the sound of thunder which must've come from the drums below, Unithien reasoned. While the choir and the band gradually became quiet, Velvet's voice still rang as clear as it had started out as until it finally ended too as the last voice in the suddenly quiet tavern before the beam of light died down, leaving the stage in darkness.

And then, without warning, the stunned silence which had followed the end of the catchy song ended only an eyeblink later as the whole tavern erupted in loud applause, roaring laughter, dirty yet appreciative comments and everything in between while pirates kept throwing even more valuables on stage.

The light returned on the stage, and Velvet was standing there, her perfect smile so radiant and vivid that it could've even outshone the gods themselves as she bowed at the ecstatic audience.

The Offspring

"Urgh...a beautiful melody, but it also has such an irritating effect on me and these poor creatures. What should I make of this earworm? Oh, I know! You need some cool tunes to counter it, but not just any will suffice. So don't debate, a player straight. You know that paladin really doesn't get it anyway! He's gonna play the field, and keep it real. For you no way, for you no way! So if you don't rate, just overcompensate. The world loves wannabes. So hey! Hey! Do that brand new thing!" Fear hummed while looking at his claws which Osmond had severed before his attention returned to the paladin who was now carrying Befana away from him. "You may not have a clue, and you may not have style. But everything you lack...well, you make up in denial! So give it to me, baby. Uh-huh, uh-huh! Give it to me, baby. Uh-huh, uh-huh! And all the nymphs say you're pretty fly...for a white guy!"

And with that weird song of power directed at Osmond backing him up, Fear stomped his foot on the ground. It sent a tremor towards the paladin who fell down with Befana because of the quake that offset his balance. "Yes, a pretty fly in a spider's web, now that I think of it. Oh, that symbolism works well indeed!" Fear growled. "I need to make that verse rhyme...perhaps I shall ask that bardic band, The Offspring, for some advice if I run into them again. Yes! I will make them mine as well, and they can be called--or rather, become--The Offspring...of Fear!"

One Piece

For the first time in the entire conversation, Kuro Tori smiled. It lasted for only the briefest of moments, however, and then his eyes narrowed again. He picked up a bone--which looked eerily like a human's kneebone now that Unithien thought of it--before he threw it in the corner. The giggling demoness ran after the flying bone on all fours, mimicking barking sounds all the way. The sound was soon replaced by snarls and munching.

"There used to be a crazy captain named Monkey D. Luffy. But he annoyed Tori-sama one time too many by monkeying around, so Tori-sama rewarded the captain for his troubles by giving him to Bai Gu Jing," Peg-Leg Mike whispered, a hint of an unsettling smile on his rugged face. "Turns out Bai's sticks and stones really did break poor Luffy's bones. Such be the fate of any who disobey or disrespect Tori-sama as the skulls we saw before we entered the Captain's Cabin demonstrated."

The Phantom of the Opera

Example 1

Refan closed in on Ax with inhuman speed, and before the warrior could step back, he grabbed and squeezed her arm until she released her grip from the sword. When Ax tried to move her knee to kick the half-demon in the groin, she suddenly felt some strange power preventing her legs from moving.

"I've learned my lesson from last time. That trick won't work on me again," Refan whispered. He pressed his lips against Ax's, and slowly but surely he felt her fierce resistance dropping as his demonic power oozed into her. It was as if time stopped, but he eventually he let her go reluctantly. "Too long you've wandered in darkness, far from my far-reaching gaze. You resist, but we both know your heart obeys. Don't betray your feelings for me!"

Example 2

"What I want is to be with you, Khalid," Ax whispered, gently moving her hands from his shoulders up to his face. "I couldn't say it last night, I was so afraid of it, so afraid of what it meant...but I'm not afraid anymore. Khalid al-Saif, I...love you."

"Only in my wildest dreams did I think I'd ever hear you say that. But I can't—I won't—I am not worthy of your love, Axikasha," Khalid said miserably. He saw disappointment and hurt in her eyes, mirroring the emotions he had felt just the night before, and found himself unable to look away. "I've already released you, and I will not go back on my word. You deserve someone who will cherish you and treat you like the queen that you are, someone who can truly make you happy. I deserve nothing. I...am a monster."

"You're not a monster, Khalid. You can make me happy...and I could do the same for you, should you let me," Ax said with tear-filled eyes.

Khalid drew in a shaky breath, relishing the scent of her. She was so close now, so warm and inviting, so beautiful. "I don't deserve...I...this makes no sense. I must be dreaming."

"If this is a dream, my love, then let us abandon thought...and let the dream descend," Ax said breathily. She felt Khalid's resolve falter, and drew him towards her in a passionate embrace. She moaned softly as their lips met in a fervent kiss, and for a mere instant, her eyes flickered red in elation.

In triumph.

Plants vs. Zombies

Rhylian stifled a giggle as she turned back to Virgil. "Sir, I fear that is as close to an acceptance of your proposal as you're likely to get. And though you say my apologies are not necessary, I shall apologize for her harsh words nonetheless. Again."

"And I shall remind you that I don't need you to apologize for me, elf!" Shyralis snapped. "I've accepted no proposals, save for the one we're running late for...but yes, we can hear him out. Now or later, it makes no difference. Druid, please tell me your plan doesn't involve sending squads of singing sunflowers at the undead?"

Portal

"But how can you still be alive?" Ferron muttered to himself, moving his finger on the surface of the glass. Hadn't that woman died in a fire decades ago? How did she end up all the way here?

As he was pondering this, Joe the parrot suddenly began singing:

But there's no sense crying

over every mistake.

You just keep on trying

'til you run out of cake.

And the science gets done.

And you make a neat gun

for the people who are

still alive...

"Shut yer mouth, ye stupid bird!" Peg-Leg Mike growled, trying to hit his pet parrot on the head to stop him from singing. "Always singin' about the weirdest things. Hey, Makoto, ye old bum, are ye still here? How about I buy ye a drink? I can buy ye all a drink as a matter o' fact!"

The Princess Bride

Example 1

The dark-haired man blinked. "I've never seen you before! Get out before you get hurt!"

"Was I so insignificant back then that you didn't even bother to memorize me even though I told you that this day would come? Very well, Wanderer. Let me introduce myself once more. Listen closely, because the following words will be the last ones you'll ever hear," the count said and pointed his staff at the man. "Hello. My name is Belial de Ardyn. You killed my brother. Prepare to die!"

Example 2

"Hello. My name is Belial de Ardyn. You killed my brother. Prepare to die!"

Elsewhere, a six-fingered man suddenly snapped, "Will you stop saying that!?!?"

His companion looked puzzled. "Saying what?"

"Never mind, it just seemed like the right thing to say at the time. Fancy some more magic mushrooms?"

"As you wish."

Ransom

Example 1

Maple faltered briefly, but then resumed her magical attacks. "I know nothing about your brat, only that you've upset some very powerful people and they want you dead."

Every attack was countered in turn by Glaurung. "You think I'll believe that? You don't know who you're fucking with. Take this back to your masters: You kill him, you kill yourself, you motherfuckers! GIVE ME BACK MY SON!"

Mel Gibson popped out of a tent, accompanied by a pair of lawyers. "Um, excuse me," he began, "But you can't say that, it's a famous line from my--"

Maple cut him off with a snarled "Incende!" and Mel and his lawyers burst into flames.

Example 2

The sky sparkled with magic above the western lands of Libaterra, in the area controlled by the Crimson Coalition. A shining, projected image of Commander Glaurung Losstarot appeared above the awed people all around the countryside. She was clad in full green armor and helmet and looked more menacing than ever before.

"Greetings, brave men and women of the Coalition! I have grave news that I wish to share with you: my son, Hannibal Losstarot, was kidnapped for ransom a few days ago, and our enemies in Alent and Maar Sul collaborated in this foul deed," she said, and a drawing of Hannibal appeared next to her. "This is a recent sketch of my son. Sweetie, if you're watching this, I love you."

Then the magical image expanded, showing Glaurung standing in a room full of gold coins, jewels and other valuables. "And this... well, this is what waits for the bastards that took my son away from me. This is your ransom. Two million gold pieces, just like you wanted. But... this is as close as you'll ever get to it. You'll never see any of this money, because no ransom will ever be paid for my son. Do you hear me? Not even one coin!"

Glaurung held a dramatic pause before she continued. "Instead, I'm offering this money as a reward on your heads, dear kidnappers. Dead or alive, it doesn't matter. Congratulations, you've just become a two million gold piece lottery ticket... except the odds are much, much better. Do you know anyone who wouldn't turn you in for two million gold pieces? I don't think you do. I doubt it. So, wherever you go and whatever you do, this money will be tracking you down for all time. And if I ever get my hands on you bastards, I'll make you wish you had never kidnapped my son!"

"But... and this is your last chance... if you return my son alive and uninjured, I'll withdraw the bounty. With any luck you can simply disappear. Understand this... you'll never see this money. Not one coin. So, you still have a chance to do the right thing. If you don't, may the gods be with you, because nobody else on this world will be!"

The magical image of Glaurung disappeared, and the skies became still once more.

The Secret of NIMH

"Take one more step and you'll regret it!" Jason shouted, doing his best to protect his wounded brother.

"Regret is such a funny word. Only weaklings have regrets!" the man growled. "In my life I've learned this much: take what you can when you can! And if you all stand between me and my wench, I'll just take your lives as compensation!"

Seiken Densetsu 3

Qadohi raised her hands in the air as she addressed her kin. "Behold! The tailless ones have chosen to walk down the Path of Blood! Now they shall face the ultimate challenge, the one who is known as Deathfang, Terror Incarnate, Eater of Souls, Doomgaze, Sharpclaw, and Beast of the Bottomless Abyss!"

The ground shook, and the heroes drew their weapons as they saw the glowing, blue eyes glowing brighter and brighter in the shadows. They could see something dark emerging from the gate, and they prepared themselves for battle.

Qadohi's voice grew louder. "Step forth, you who are the deadliest creation of Lord Shakkan, you who are his pride and joy, you whose true name is..."

Khasra blinked in disbelief once the black creature had fully emerged from the shadows of the gate. "What the hell? That's a facking--"

"...PLUSHIEBUNNY!" Qadohi concluded her speech triumphantly.

Greg rubbed his wrists and walked towards the cute, ordinary-looking black bunny which had appeared. "I was afraid of THIS? What a joke! This cutie couldn't even hurt a fly!"

"Keep your distance!" Ariadne ordered and closed her eyes when she saw Greg take the bunny in his arms. She waited for an agonizing scream of death, but she heard nothing so she opened her eyes and gasped. Greg was unharmed.

"Come on, Ariadne! You're overreacting! Shakkan's just making us look like fools, that's all!" Greg smiled and turned his eyes to Plushiebunny. "Look at him! The little fella's all scared! Don't worry, Uncle Greg won't harm you--"

Plushiebunny's jaws suddenly opened wide and swallowed Greg whole. The creature rapidly grew into its true, gigantic form and turned its blue, sinister eyes to the heroes. It burped and grinned evilly, and then it attacked.

Titaniel crapped his pants.

Shadow Hearts: Covenant

Suddenly Jacob smiled. "I know you are in there somewhere, Axikasha! Since you have been so kind as to help Me reach My goals today, I shall let you in on one more secret. Remember that girl, Shyla? What if I told you that she is still alive and waiting for you? I figured out that it was she who was originally meant to have Dawn. Yes, you are not the Chosen One, after all! Your only purpose is to deliver Dawn to Shyla, and I assure you that I will make it happen. You shall be forced to confront the shadows of your past, so remember these words!"

"Before you continue your boring speech, can I ask a favour?" Ax muttered.

Jacob sighed. "What do you wish, fool?"

"I wish you'd shove it. You know where!" the female warrior chuckled.

Shaft

Decanus cleared his throat and suddenly twirled around quite elegantly before he stopped, gazing into Varalia's eyes. "Who's the white pirate dick that's a sex machine to all the chicks?" he hummed.

"Decanus!" Smee and the pirates sang in response, their looks no longer fierce but almost sultry.

"You're damn right!" the captain continued. "Who is the man that would risk his neck for his brother man?"

"Decanus!" came the reply from the pirate chorus.

"Can ya dig it?" Decanus hummed, his voice deeper now. "Who's the cat that won't cop out when there's danger all about?"

"Decanus!" the choir moaned.

The captain grinned. "Right on! You see, this cat Decanus is a bad mother--"

"Shut your mouth!" the crew responded.

He wagged his finger. "But I'm talkin' about Decanus!"

The choir smiled and sang as one: "Then we can dig it!"

"He's a complicated man, but no one understands him but his women!" Decanus cried out.

"Decanus Tafford!" the pirate crew asserted in a powerful crescendo which led to the climactic finale. "Captain Hook!"

Shane

"Unithien...daughter, listen to me. Whatever that...siren did to you, whatever she or that Eye made you experience to have you react in such a way, this is not who you are," Varalia said. "And no matter what Persephone has done to you, Nesa or others in the past, you shouldn't cross the line just like you didn't cross it with Gilgamesh. She's an ally, whether we like it or not. Trust me when I say this: there's no living with a killing. There's no going back from it. Right or wrong, it's a brand, a brand that sticks. There's no going back. You're not a killer, and I can't let you walk down the same path I did even if you think you can do so. I would never forgive myself for it."

She saw her daughter glance at her, and she continued, this time more softly. "Magic is a tool, Unithien. No better and no worse than any other tool--an axe, a shovel, or anything. Magic isn't just about light or dark; it's as good or as bad as the one using it. Remember that."

Skyrim

"It's dishonorable to run from a fight, Benjamin."

Benjamin whimpered, looking up at Logaine as he moved in for the kill. "P-please don't! I'm just a guard! I have a family!"

"No Benjamin, you were a guard, you had a family." Logaine raised the Halberd up behind him. "And then you took an arrow to the knee." With a single movement, he swung, severing the guard's head immediately.

What followed was a chorus of groans from around him as the members of the Eyes walked out, as well as a few bow wielding Fists.

"Seriously? Arrow to the Knee? That joke was old even before I was born!" One of the Eyes muttered, prompting Jerik to agree.

"Yeah, you need better material Logey." Jerik tapped his chin. "Have you tried asking Credo for one liners?"

"All of you, temple, now!" Logaine's eye twitched violently at the mention of Credo's name, storming off followed by the crowd of mixed warriors.

Sleeping Beauty

Duchart's sentence ended abruptly as he finally saw what he had been looking at. His horse whinnied at the same time he realized that these Proninist riders were not alive at all and yet their mounts were alive but oddly still. He was looking at eyeless corpses of men in varying stages of decay, and he recognized a man with a captain's uniform in the lead. "What in the name of the Queen is this?"

"I call it a sincere greeting from one Northern army to another on the eve of a most glorious battle," replied an eerily calm voice, and Duchart turned to face a bearded man with a precisely cut, blond hair dressed in a red armor and a dark red cape on horseback. The man narrowed his eyes as he studied Duchart's uniform. "Well, well...this is a pleasant surprise. We set our trap for some low-ranking herald and lo! We catch an actual Commander instead!"

At that moment Duchart saw something materialize out of thin air around him and his escorts: small but hideous red creatures with pointy teeth and sharp claws who attacked him and his escorts just as the knights were drawing their swords. The struggle was over before it had properly begun despite the knights' valiant attempt to defend themselves in the ambush.

"Away with them, but gently, my imps, gently. His Grace has plans for our military guests," the man said to the creatures who were tying the three knights up.

Snakes on a Plane

Meanwhile, Ax was locked in a duel to the death with her own worst nightmare, the Soap.

She laughed harshly as her blade finally met Soapflesh, cleanly slicing it in half. "Take that, you bastard!"

The two halves sank to the ground slowly...then, to Ax's horror, rose up again, swiftly growing to form two complete Soaps.

Ax narrowed her eyes. "Oh, give me a break! I'VE HAD IT WITH THIS MOTHERFUCKING SOAP IN THESE MOTHERFUCKING RUINS!"

South Park

"No! They killed Kenny! You bastards! Come, let's avenge him, Eric!" another drunk, Wilheim, cried and charged at the treant, only for the creature to headbutt him and send him flying into the canopy above while he let out a goofy scream which was both terrifying and oddly hilarious at the same time.

"Fools," the dwarf muttered, keeping his distance from the beast while scanning his surroundings less franctically than many others in the mob.

A fat 18-year-old in the crowd looked in terror at the rampaging treant. "Screw you guys, I'm going home!" he groaned and attempted to leave only to find himself facing the other end of a sword held by the younger of the two redheads.

"Aren't you ashamed of yourself...Eric, was it? You're but an uneducated cartman at home, but this is your chance to become a true hero and save damsels in distress who'll be happy to serve your needs in every way possible!" the redhead boy said. "There are no rewards without risks, though, but we can prevail if we fight together!"

"No! I'm tired of no one respecting my authorita at home, true, but I'd rather be a living cartman than a dead hero!" Eric the cartman retorted. "Kyle can die for all I care, though. He's half related to those money-grubbing parasites known as Sinlarine, anyway. Them clannish crazies are planning to take over the world with their creepy spirit mumbo jumbo, just wait and see! And we all know what Kyle's mom is like!"

"Shut up, cartman!" Kyle the half-Sinlarine shouted angrily, turning his attention to the fat man. "You shut your big fat mouth right now and fight that beast like these brave O'Harris brothers asked us to do, or I swear I'll kick your--" His sentence ended when the treant crashed into him and Eric and impaled them with sharp wooden spikes which were rapidly growing from its body.

The treant shook itself until the impaled bodies fell off, and it trampled on their bodies as if to erase all trace of them from existence before facing the rest of the mob.

A Scun in the mob looked at a fellow Scun. "Any ideas, McCain?"

The other Scun shrugged. "I'm out of ideas, Romney! And I...I just crapped me fackin' pants!"

Spec Ops: The Line

Slowly the rest of the rattled party rose to their feet. Irinthiel shook her head, trying to stop the ringing in her ears. Aside from a few minor injuries, everyone seemed okay. The half-elf allowed herself a sigh of relief.

And then she froze. Cries of pain, fear and anger filled the air--coming from the abandoned building behind them. Unthinking, ignoring Varjo's cries of protest, she broke into a run towards the building.

It can't be. That building...was empty. Empty. Empty. Right?

She used her magic to clear a path and stumbled into the wrecked building. Almost immediately, she wished she hadn't...yet she couldn't look away. Not now. She cast a small light spell as she walked slowly through the carnage, every image burning itself into her memory.

Here, an aged Sarquil woman crawling feebly, her legs now gone below the knee. She looked up at Irinthiel accusingly, but said nothing. There, a bandaged young warrior shuffling away from the chaos, his expression haunted. Against a wall, a young girl tried in vain to wake her bleeding father.

And there in the middle of the room, a mother cradling her child, desperately trying to shield him, both of their faces contorted in their last agonized screams.

Irinthiel sank to her knees, forcing herself to take in every bit of the scene. Forcing herself to commit it all to memory. Nearby, a Sarquil man with half of his face burned beyond recognition turned his remaining eye toward her.

"Why?" he croaked. "We were...just trying to keep them safe...keep them away from the riot."

"I...I don't know," Irinthiel said numbly. "We were just trying to help. I never wanted...any of this."

The man laughed harshly before breaking into a cough. "You brought this on yourselves, Alentian scum. You'll pay. One way or another...you'll...pay..."

Star Wars Series

Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

Two demons who, unlike their attacking brethren, were clad in green armor were standing on the deck of the Leviathan. Their eyes reflected the flames that were now devouring the panicking pirate ship which had nowhere to run anymore.

"That attack was so exquisite, so deadly, so precise. Just like you, baby," the male one of the pair sighed as he looked dreamily at the blood-drenched demoness next to him. "You look so...beautiful. Blood really suits you, Heloha."

"I only look this beautiful because I'm so in love with you Melatha," Heloha replied and flashed a mischievous smile while she was licking her bloody fingers clean with her forked tongue.

Melatha shook his head. "No, it's because I'm so in love with you!"

Heloha tilted her head, studying the fellow demon's face while seemingly oblivious to the horrific cries of pain from pirates being set aflame and disemboweled. She tried to mimick a serious, almost scolding look although a hint of mischievousness still remained in her burning eyes. "So love, or should I say lust, has blinded you, then?"

"Well...that's not exactly what I meant," Melatha coughed and blushed while scratching his neck.

"But it's probably trueee~!" Heloha giggled sweetly in response, no longer able to keep a straight face. She impulsively grabbed Melatha's arm and pressed his body against hers, sharing a long, passionate kiss with him.

Episode IV: A New Hope

At the very end, shrouded in shadow, they found the person their contact had directed them to. The man stepped into the light, a knowing smirk on his weathered face. "Hans Olo. I'm captain of the Chiliad Cormorant. Chew here tells me you're looking for passage to the Alent harbor?"

Another man stepped into the light. Syrese was quite sure he was the hairiest man she'd ever seen.

The Titan stepped forward, peering suspiciously at the two men. "We are, but what the hell kind of name is that? Yamatian?" Beside him, Syrese raised an eyebrow.

The man's smirk faltered slightly. "You've never heard of the Chiliad Cormorant?"

Syrese tilted her head. "Well, Mr. Olo, we...just got here. Should we have?"

"It's the ship that made the Simoe Gorge run in less than twelve parsecs!" Hans boasted, puffing up his chest.

"But I thought parsec was a measurement of length?" Syrese murmured, crossing her arms. "And does this...truly count as a ship? Does it even--"

The Titan groaned. "Quiet, woman. Just...be quiet."

"If the lady is done nitpicking, feel free to start loading up," Hans said, lighting a lantern. "I'll show you around once we head out. My partner here is Chewbacco, Chew for short. He doesn't talk much, just chews tobacco. Doesn't shave much, either."

Chew made an odd warbling sound.

Hans winced. "He's a little hard to understand when he does talk. Might've fallen off the deck a few too many times."

The lantern blazed up and warm light washed over the deck, revealing the Chiliad Cormorant in all its glory.

"What a piece of junk," Syrese and the Titan said in unison.

Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back

The door opened at that moment, and they saw a blue-cloaked, black man with greying hair and suave moustache looking at them from the doorway. The look on his face was somewhat displeased as he focused on the elfess and opened his mouth. "Why, you slimy, double-crossing, no-good swindler... *hic* ...'s wife. You got a lot of guts coming here, after what your *hic* 'hubby' pulled," the man slurred, the smell of cheap liquor easily distinguishable in his breath while he acted out the air quotes with his index fingers. He then clenched his fist and suddenly took a few steps forward, seemingly ready to punch Bella's teeth in right then and there. However, just as the group was about to tense and defend themselves from this unexpected assault, the man's look of mock anger changed into a mischievous smirk as he laughed out loud and pulled the elfess into his dark embrace. "Mwhahaha, I got you good, didn't I? How're you doing, you damn fine elven woman, you? It's so good to see you!"

"Well, h-he seems f-friendly enough," Arcturius muttered while watching the laughing man in a blue cape now shaking hands with Bella.

The Union thief did his best to keep a straight face. "Yes, very friendly. You'll see."

It was only now that the man in the cape started paying attention to the pair behind Bella. "Ah, Mrs. Sirius, I see you're hanging out with these losers," he addressed the thief first. "No hard feelings, my man; I know you Union fellas prefer your aliases so I won't bother asking for your current one. Still, I can't help but think your people should've been able to give the Coalition a bit more of a challenge at the Rivers. Word's spread about the Coalition's glorious victory up there, and some people downtown still won't shut up about it. They keep babbling about how the dirty thieves and pompous mages got licked good and hard that day by heroes of the people. I guess that kind of trash talk is the Coalition's way of boosting their troop's morale this side of the Great River too or someth...well, hellooo, what have we here?" His expression changed when he happened to take a closer look at Arc. The man's carefree personality was instantly replaced by something far more...suave. "I'm 'Land-ho!' Calvus Rissian, but friends call me Cal. I'm the administrator of this fine facility also known as Cloud Cottage. And who might you be, young man?"

Arcturius stared at the man, taking note of his suddenly changed attitude. He felt a light nudge from Bella who glanced sideways at him and nodded slightly in the black man's direction, which prompted the boy to answer. "I-I am Arcturius, a f-friend of M-miss Bella. N-nice to m-meet you, Mr. Rissian."

If it was humanly possible, the already suave look on Cal Rissian's face turned even more charming while he eloquently raised one of his dark eyebrows. He leaned over, took the boy's hand in his in a sweeping motion and kissed it softly, all the while looking into the young bard's eyes in such a deep way that words couldn't explain. "Welcome, Arcturius." His voice sounded deep now, like the voice of the best crooners, and the alluring smile stayed on his face, revealing a set of perfect white teeth as it turned into a wolfish grin. "You look absolutely beautiful for a boy of your ripe age. You truly belong here with us among the Clouds."

Bella smiled the best she could, gently stepping between the semi-retired charmer of a smuggler and the boy before either of the two would make a scene while the Union thief facepalmed and shook his head ever so slightly in the background.

Episode VI: Return of the Jedi

Cain raised an eyebrow. "So you've accepted the truth that resistance is futile, then. The truth that no matter what, the Master's will encompasses all."

"No," Skye retorted, staring into the dark knight's eyes. "I've accepted the truth that you were once Abel Highwind, my brother in arms in the Grand Alliance, who I thought had perished but who had survived and has now been led astray. Not only that, but more than anything, you were my friend. All of us were your friends! You can't have forgotten it!"

Cain narrowed his eyes. "I've said it before and I'll say it again. That name no longer has any meaning for me."

"That's the thing. It is the name of your true self! You've only forgotten," Skye argued. "I know there's still good in you. This cult and their so-called Master haven't driven it from you fully. Not yet. That's why you won't stop me like your minions tried to do. That's why you won't bring me to your Master now."

"I sense it now. I have been blind to the truth all along, it seems." Cain murmured. "Indeed you have potential as the Master has foreseen. You're no longer a clueless village girl but a woman ready to take her fated place, a true daughter of Cassandria in both body and spirit."

Skye looked at the dark knight, and a thought crossed her head. "How about you come with me instead? You're conflicted, but you can do the right thing like you did when you fought alongside us. It's not too late to switch sides!"

"Marcus Sarillius once thought as you do," Cain began, and suddenly his voice turned colder, more frightening. "You don't know the power of the Void and the role of the Blessed. I must obey my Master."

"I will not become this deranged cult's ally. And you'll be forced to kill me," Skye protested before her eyes turned softer, doubting. "Tell me the truth. Could you really go through with it and do that to me, your old friend?"

"If that is your destiny," the dark knight replied non-chalantly.

"Search your feelings. You know you can't do this. The dutiful dragon knight I once knew never would've succumbed to despair this easily, no matter how deep a darkness he faced! He swore to always find a way back to the light even when everything seemed lost!" Skye pleaded. "I know there's conflict within you even now. Let go of your hate and despair. There's still time to make things right."

Cain looked into Skye's eyes and, perhaps, for the first time the woman saw a glimpse of something else behind his dark gaze. "It is...too late for me, Skye." His tone then turned darker. "Kamen Grimgaze will show you the true nature of the Void. He is your Master now."

"Then Abel Highwind is truly dead," Skye sighed and pointed her sword at the dark knight.

Street Fighter

"Ryu, Ken, now!" Oscar shouted, climbing a rope up to the crossbeams that held the sails.

Ken attacked the serpentine beast first as its head got closer to the railing. He bellowed, "SHORE-YOU-KEN!" his mana-powered fist collided with the serpent's jaw, sending it reeling back. Ryu's technique had to be charged up, so he followed up Ken's attack, bellowing, "HAAAAA-DOUGH-KEN!" He hurled a beam of mana forward, colliding into the reeling serpent's throat.

Suikoden 2

The air became heavier as dark magic concentrated around Leraje's body. It was then that the fiend transformed, his armor adapting to his true, malevolent form. He grew twice as tall, and his big, now-demonic body looked intimidating with its tattoos and muscles. The Dreadlord's horns were long and gruesome, and his wings looked huge and spiky. His tail was pointy and looked powerful enough to pierce any armor. His sharp claws and teeth looked ominous under the sun, but the most dreadful things were the red eyes which burned with pure malice.

"Don't let him intimidate you!" Khasra barked to his companions. "We'll--" His sentence was cut short when the Dreadlord punched him in the face with blinding speed, sending him tumbling down.

The fiend cut down six Black Guards effortlessly and grinned. "What? Is this the best you can do? Where's that confidence of yours now?" he laughed with his deep, demonic voice and gleefully tore apart any nearby Sarquil and Blades that got in his way. "You can round up a million maggots to try to defeat me... but you'll still all just be maggots!"

Super Mario Bros

Example 1

Kaisa hugged herself, trying to keep her teeth from chattering. What on earth had she been thinking, going off alone like this? From the corner of her eye, she thought she saw a flash of red gliding beneath the water. Probably just her imagination, she decided. She eyed the shore, then glanced back at the ship, and muttered a word Ax had told her ladies weren't supposed to use. Everything seemed so far away, and her arms were aching so badly...

And now Ax's boat had stopped, it seemed. Kaisa stamped her foot in annoyance, then cursed again as the resulting splash soaked her pants up to the knee.

Wait a minute, the... splash?

Wasn't the water supposed to be outside the boat?

Kaisa cursed a third time as she finally noticed the water swelling inside the shabby rowboat. How had she not noticed this before? At this rate, the boat wouldn't last another five minutes... and there was that flash of red again. This time, she was almost sure it wasn't her imagination.

She cursed again, then started to scream.

As the rowboat's occupants cowered, something circled in the water near the downed ship... something big. With a huge splash and one mighty gulp, the giant red fish swallowed a nearby survivor and disappeared beneath the waves.

Example 2

"These people will be capable of finishing the slaughter even without your 'assistance'. And even if they stopped for some reason, Lord Cain's pet will make sure that those who survived won't live for long," the masked mage stated.

Zenobia gasped. "You mean he let the Omari fish loose? But what about all the tests concerning the Blood Fever and its side effects on--"

"Don't worry: there'll be other specimens. This chaos you created is a perfect opportunity to test the Omari fish in action. Whatever happens, the data it'll provide will be most useful to the Master," the masked mage interrupted.

Taken

When the Anti Mage Police officer noticed the stairs beginning to move, he stomped his foot on the ground. "Liam Neeson, I know you're there. Stop with this geomancy nonsense right this instant, or I'll have you dragged into our dungeons as well! Find other fools to screw around with if you're that bored."

"I don't tolerate some whippersnappers stepping on my lawn...I mean, alley!" came a cranky response from an old voice from one of the windows above, and an elderly man with fierce eyes peeked out. "You kids these days, thinking you can do whatever you want while pushing us elderly aside. I'll let you know that Liam Neeson is the greatest geomancer ever, a top graduate from the Lutherin college of magic, and will have the respect he deserves--"

"Liam Neeson! Still up at this late hour? Shame on you! You drag your wrinkly ass to bed right now, or you'll never eat my cherry pie ever again, hubby or not!" an even more annoyed voice, belonging to a woman, shouted. "And stop with that stairs nonsense. You're not a child anymore, haven't been one for 70 years, in fact. Grow up already!"

Tense silence descended on the alley until an audible groan was heard...from Styl whose body was still recovering from the AMP officer's spell.

"Fine!" came the reply from the geomancer immediately after. "I'll come to bed, hon. Don't get mad at me, please. Your cherry pie is the best, pinkie swear...although I like apple pie more." He shut the window, leaving events to unfold on the alley down below as usual while the stairs and the ground stopped moving as the geomancy spell wore off.

The Thief of Bagdad

The white mage looked ahead and saw the ship moving towards a strait which was surrounded by two huge, pillar-like rock formations. "Shouldn't you slow down? We're going to crash unless our speed drops!" she gasped as her eyes noticed a cliff on the other end of the strait which cut off the waterway.

Makoto had a knowing smile on his face. "All is being taken care of. Just wait and see. Or hear, as the case may be."

"I never know why men come back from sea

The sea is cruel, but the sea is clean..."

Unithien immediately turned her eyes up the mast where this new, loud voice was coming from. She saw a lone sailor standing in the crow's nest, singing in a perfect key. The man's strong baritone voice, which seemed to be amplified with magic, continued:

"The cause of this vast purity must be

That men at sea are few and far between!"

It was a sad yet somewhat determined melody, bittersweet in its tone and yet oddly empowering. Before Unithien could ponder why a sailor had suddenly begun singing, she heard another voice, this time a woman's:

"Hardship is all she ever gave to me

And yet I ask why men come back from sea..."

The white mage's eyes turned to the source of this new voice, and she saw a blond woman in white standing on the cliffs above as the ship sailed at full speed into the strait and past the Pillars of Autumn. Her voice was melodic and beautiful. It was an aged yet strong soprano which was in contrast with the deep baritone of the sailor. The woman continued in a beautiful yet cold voice:

"The sea is cruel, but the sea is clean

Oh, poor brown earth, how kind you might have been!"

She heard other voices joining in. Although many of these sailors weren't good singers, the sheer strength of their collective voices gave resonance to the two soloist's perfomance as the wind carried the melody. She could sense magic in the air but this was magic she wasn't too familiar of.

And then, much to her shock, she saw the cliffs on the other side of the strait move...or had it all been an illusion which now gave way to the hidden truth behind it? She was too in awe to fully understand what was going on, and all she could do was watch as their ship sailed past the cliffs and into what lay beyond.

What she saw surprised her just as much as the cliffs, which had moved with the song's power, had. The ship had entered a caldera, a natural bay formed into a crater surrounded by tall cliffs on all sides. And deeper in this caldera was a house, then another, and soon an entire port revealed itself to her, and the docks were full of ships of all kinds, ranging from small boats to larger vessels.

Three Amigos

Meanwhile, a trio of elves trudged through the desert nearing Vanna. The lanky, bald, armored giant led quietly, grinning through the exhaustion and exposure. Behind him, the yellow garbed youth followed in his shadow, muttering to himself. And bringing up the rear, the only native to these deserts bitched the loudest.

"Lucky, just stop for a while! I'm hot and tired and sweaty and thirsty!"

Baldy glanced back and snorted, returning to his mechanical strides across the sandy wastes. His young follower hun back a bit and looked sideways at his short, dark companion.

"I thought you were from here, Dusty. Going to let a bunch of foreigners show you up?" He got what he was fishing for, a furious tirade from the archer.

"I left here to escape the sun and sand in every orifice of my body, you asshole! If it weren't for the Crimson Coalition's fat ass bounty, I wouldn't have step foot in this hellhole full of sand and shrouded xenophobes and zealots." Lucky once again glared back, causing Dusty to stop further outbursts.

"You know, Dusty, you better be more tolerant of your countrymen when we reach Vanna. You're our only in with that lot."

"Shut up, Ned. I know my part. I've been at this way longer than you, ya know."

"Hmm," was Ned's only response, as he quickened his pace to return to Lucky's shadow. Dusty put his hood up and glowered at them both as he begrudgingly tried to keep pace. Vanna loomed achingly far in the distance.

Titanic

The two lovers stood at the bow of the ship, one behind the other, pressed gently to the railing. Fingers intertwined, they raised their hands until they were standing with arms outstretched on each side... like wings, perhaps. When they tilted their heads a certain way, there was nothing in their field of vision but water. It was like there was no ship under them at all, just the two of them soari--

"What the hell are you idiots doing?" an annoyed female voice demanded.

Startled, the two men stumbled backwards sheepishly. Jose blushed. Rack managed to stammer, "My apologies, Captain. We were just... ah... testing something."

Ax raised an eyebrow. "Testing something, you say?"

"Yes, Captain," Rack mumbled. "We just--"

"Oh, stop," Ax interrupted. "I don't even want to know. Just get out of here already."

With a sigh of relief, Rack and Jose scrambled away. Ax shook her head in amusement.

Tombstone

Example 1

General Leopold Lain reached a hill overseeing the ford and slammed a black flag with a red lion holding a skull and a compass rose on the ground... the proud flag of the Crimson Coalition. "This is only the beginning, Alent! From this day forth you can no longer cower behind barricades and spells for we have finally taken the battle to your inner sanctum, the heartlands! Now the east shall experience the wrath which we had to endure in the west for years!" he yelled at the Alentians while the roars of thousands of Coalition soldiers and mages echoed behind him. "Flee and let your cowardly Council of Usurpers know that we're coming...and hell's coming with us!"

Example 2

At last, the Sinlarine man's guests got up and left. Relaxing a bit, Ax sauntered to the table and plopped down, her half-finished mug of ale sloshing about wildly. "A Sinlarine, a Fraquid and a dwarf walk into a bar...sounds like the start of a lousy joke," Ax snickered, leaning back in her chair. "And oh, can't forget the loud asshole in shining armor. Who was the big ugly bastard, anyway? Swinging around a sword that big...gotta be compensating for something, don't ya think?"

Corwin's gloomy expression made it clear that he was not in the mood for joking. "You shouldn't concern yourself with these matters, Ax. But that man is known as the Destroyer, or Gilgamesh. Supposedly a warrior without equal."

Ax snorted, her drink still sloshing about, threatening to spill at any moment. "A warrior without equal, eh? Never heard of him. What do you think? Should I hate him?"

"You don't even know him," Corwin said flatly.

"Yeah, but there was just something about him. Something around the eyes...I don't know, reminds me of..." Ax trailed off, suddenly sitting up straight. "Me. No, I'm sure of it. I hate him!"

Trailer Park Boys

"Oh gods!" Maple grimaced as she noticed that a Scun sailor had dropped his pants and taken a dump on the ship's deck.

"Sorry, ma'am! Me just got sooooo nervuz aboot all diz Donnerwetter Party schtuff!" the sailor replied bashfully. "Me haz a weak stomach, y'see!"

"Get that piece of shit off my ship immediately!" ordered Captain Donner.

Nearby Scuns took a firm grip of the sailor and threw him overboard.

"Not him, you idiots, but that pile of crap over there!" Donner hissed and pointed at the excrement that was still on deck. The stench was getting horrible by now.

As the Scuns heaved the sailor's feces off the ship, Maple considered whether she should insert pencils into her nose again.

---

Sergeant Lahey met Corporal Randy at the docks of Scundor. "Did you find anything in Carriage Park?"

Carriage Park was the neighbourhood in Scundor which consisted of carriages parked next to one another. It was basically a slum where the less fortunate Scuns, or bums as Lahey liked to call them, lived in. Lahey and Randy had been instructed to keep things in order in that neighbourhood, and they had recently traced the origin of certain drugs to that area.

"Nope. The place was clean like a newborn baby's ass, and Julian and his pals were nowhere in sight. I suppose they got wind of the raid and took all the evidence with them before I arrived," Randy sighed, scratching his big, hairy belly. He never wore a shirt for some reason. "Are you drunk, boss? We're on duty, y'know."

"Damn those Carriage Park Boys! Sexian is hot, but even so it's illegal to smuggle drugs into this city. I'm gonna catch him in the act someday, just wait and see!" Lahey hissed, his face turning bright red. "And I'm not drunk! I've only had two drinks, that's all!"

Randy knew better, though. Lahey always said he had "only had two drinks", but the actual number of drinks was often much greater than that. Lahey was an alcoholic, and it should have been Randy's duty to take him to the authorities, but Randy loved him passionately, and he could never betray his lover. However, Randy did not like how Lahey was so obsessive about catching Julian (or Sexian as Lahey usually called that handsome drug dealer). So far Julian and his friends, who ran a drug business somewhere in Carriage Park, had eluded them, but sooner or later that so-called Carriage Park Boys gang would run out of luck.

Randy frowned all of a sudden as he smelled the air. "Oh, sweet mother of mercy! What's that foul stench coming from the sea?"

Lahey gazed on the horizon, and he had a weary, knowing look in his eyes. "It's the wind of shit, Randy. The wind of shit."

Troll 2

"Fack! That goat thingie's eatin' poor Romney!" the voice of McCain cried out. "And then it's gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOD~!!!"

An unsettling grin emerged on Fear's face while the other Scun's voice turned into a horrific shriek before the sound in the bushes was replaced by what sounded like someone eating very sloppily.

Watchmen

Nina smiled warmly but that smile felt like someone was stabbing your heart a hundred times. "So you have heard about us? I'm flattered," she continued. "I wanted to talk to you personally to congratulate you on a job well done."

"Well, the portal's closed, and your plans have failed. Illunii won't be invaded anytime soon," Vitani grunted.

"The portal is only a minor loss in the big picture. What I got instead will be much more useful for my horde in the long run," Nina said in a mocking tone. "The poor Sinlarine girl aided my cause without knowing it by shattering her magical scepter with hopes of stopping my minions; instead she caused something beyond her imagination. Jezebeth's scheme involving her was only the icing on an already delicious cake which I had baked long in advance. The scepter she shattered had an exact copy in Thanatos's laboratory, but neither she nor the elven fool realized the true meaning behind the term Twins and what powers one scepter would possess if its twin was ever destroyed. They thought the term Twins either referred to two powerful shades or the two books of prophecy...exactly as I planned."

Xolkai hurried to the bookshelfs in the laboratory, searching for the scepter...but found nothing. "What have you done?" he hissed.

"Do you seriously think I'd explain my masterstroke if there remained the slightest chance of you affecting its outcome?" The archdemon raised her arm, revealing the distinct form of a scepter, the exact twin copy of the one Deidra had once held. "I had another minion in the Barca manor, and she delivered this scepter to me four days ago." She had a warm, motherly smile on her human face, which was a creepy constrast to her burning demonic eyes.

The Wizard of Oz

"To Remonton!" exhulted Leon, "Follow the Yellow Brick Road!"

World of Warcraft

As Signan droned on, Vaetris surveyed their surroundings. She could've sworn she'd heard a rustle of sand, but perhaps it was just the wind.

She held up a hand to silence Signan. There it was again... definitely not the wind.

"Ax!" she whispered harshly. "Something... something's up ahead!"

"AAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIII!" came an unholy screech. A lump popped up in the sand, then burst through, a deadly-tipped spear swinging around wildly. Then came another, and another. Soon, nearly twenty of the creatures had broken through the surface, each with a spear and shield pointed at the group.

As the dust cleared, the creatures became visible. Squat, sturdy, pallid-skinned... things covered in strange tattoos. They wore strange masks and loincloths that reminded Vaetris of the jungle folk she'd seen so long ago... though the jungle folk hadn't been nearly so... so...

Short.

The heroes paused, some drawing their weapons. Rhylian tentatively crept forward, bow at the ready. "Sirithai...?"

Ax was pale, nearly as pale as the strange creatures before them. "No. Hephaestus help us, they're goddamn sand gnomes!"

Various

Note: The following excerpt contains bits from various films, songs, games etc. Have fun identifying all the quotes!

Razoul's eyes burned with passion. "I want to say something important to you now as we face our darkest hour. I'm proud of you, and it's one of the greatest honours of my life to stand here before you. Today I've discarded the sacred Ebony Helmet, the symbol of our power. I've done so because I want to address you not as your captain but as a fellow warrior who will stand and fight by your side 'til the bitter end!"

"We, the Black Guard, exist for only one purpose: to protect our homeland and our proud tribes. No matter what's in our way, we won't stop. No matter what comes through the gate, we'll kick its ass back to the fiery pits it came from. Know this, brave warriors of Vanna: we're not alone in this fight! The spirits of our dead shall stand with us and guide our blades into the hearts of our enemies. Today every generation of the Sarquil will rise up to defend our homeland, and our joined blades shall pierce the heavens!"

"Descendants of Tronin! Remember this day as it shall be the day when you shed your blood for the sake of many. Today is the Day of Wrath that our prophecies have warned us about. The forces of darkness are waiting to destroy this ancient city, and they do this for their despicable master, Dreadlord Leraje of the Northern Horde. So what do we, the Black Guard, do for our master, His Majesty Khalid al-Saif?"

"We defend! We stand! We show that as one! United! We destroy!" the berserkers chanted. They clanged their scimitars together and yelled out their anger as Drakeroot began to affect their bodies and minds.

Razoul nodded. "Indeed! I'll be honest with you: not all of us will survive the coming onslaught. In fact, most of us will fall before this battle is over. That much is certain. However, to die today on this field of battle is to die a death worthy of our ancestors. But we don't do this only to please the dead, no! We do it also for the sake of those who still live! To die today is to die for our little ones, our old ones and our loved ones. Would you deny yourselves such a magnificent death worthy of legend, such an honour as a warrior, the culmination of everything you've fought for all these years? Tell me, brave warriors of Vanna, do you wish to be seen as cowards?"

"No!" the berserkers roared. "We're not afraid to open our mouths and scream! We believe in a better tomorrow! We believe in what we say! In arms against the shadows, destroying the dark! FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT 'til the break of dawn!"

"Yes, brave warriors of Vanna, do not go gently into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light! Today our enemies have come to crush us, but instead we'll crush them! No longer will we wait behind barred doors and walls of stone. No longer will our vengeance be denied. Today even the gods themselves shall tremble before our wrath!"

"Our enemies may threaten us with their words and weapons, but they can take nothing from us that we're not willing to give, and we're not willing to give our lives to them without a fight. My father Ismail told us that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself. However, today we won't stop there, no! Instead we'll kick fear's ass so hard that it'll limp away and never come back to haunt us! Let our enemies behind that gate be warned: we'll stand our ground! Hear me, brave warriors of Vanna! Give our enemies nothing, but take from them... everything!"

The western gate opened, and an army of bloodthirsty demons and their savage allies poured into the city like an unstoppable tide. Their thundering roars shook the very foundations of the earth.

"Remember the oath that you swore the day you became defenders of our homeland! Do the impossible, break the unbreakable, and never surrender! That's the way of the Black Guard! Arise! Arise, descendants of Tronin! Spears shall be shaken, shields shall be splintered! A sore day, a red day, ere the sun rises! Follow me as my equals towards ruin and the world's ending!" Razoul cried and began running towards the gate, pointing his twin scimitars at the attacking demons. "Death! Death! Death! Go forth, fierce warriors of Vanna! Protect your loved ones with your lives and swing your swords until you drown in the blood of your enemies! Fight the power!"

"RAW! RAW! FIGHT THE POWER!" the berserkers of the Black Guard chanted and followed their captain into the heat of battle while yelling defiantly at the enemies ahead: "JUST WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK WE ARE?!"

"Come on, guys, do you want to live forever? Razoul and his warriors need all the help they can get!" Marcus smiled to his companions and rushed into battle. His sword Dusk was already glowing brightly. "Today is a day worth remembering, a bunch of heroes fighting against the odds! We few, we happy few..."

"We band of buggered," Khasra muttered and followed Marcus's lead.